Premiership Round 8...

Wolverhampton Badgers 26 CAU Madrid Rugby XIII 10 (H 12-0) (R 14-4)
Two on the trot at home for the West Midlands outfit; Antonio wants to return to Iberia and some home cooking, not liking Wolverhampton curry...
Cumberland Falcons 16 Saint-Maur Beavers 12 (H 0-12) (R 8-38)
Even in defeat, the French side shows that they are extremely dangerous, although Jerome is glowering; Mark is happy with the second half, at least...
Hull Kingston Redskins 32 Northern Bulls of Burgas 25 (H 12-18) (R 22-22)
A pulsating encounter on the Humber; Savage unhappy, Padds not entirely happy, fans very happy...
Zagreb Buffaloes 12 Rotterdam Rhinos 42 (H 12-18) (R 12-22)
You think Steve isn't happy now? Wait until he sees the penalties stats; Theo has already ordered imitation artificial Gatorade for Rhinos' training tomorrow, having read the same stats...
Monte-Carlo Martinis 24 Gibralter Rockies 20 (H 18-12) (R 20-20)
I don't know who's more unhappy with the result; all I know is, the sports books at the casinos there made out like bandits on this game. and this was probably the best game of the round...
West Yorkshire Terriers 12 Tel-Aviv Nomads 42 (H 0-24) (R 28-10)
Do these things happen in Yorkshire? Given the coach's reaction, absolutely not...Neil is trying to get promoted to Vandal, and this will help...
European Vagrants 4 Dublin Dynamo 24 (H 4-18) (R 26-6)
You don't want to be a Vagrant right now, as Kevin has a new reddish colour on his face; the Guinness is flowing in Dublin (not on the plane, though - just ask Danny Brough!), and Clint is leading the side in a chorus of "Cockles and Mussels"...

Next week - the Premiership takes the week off...

...instead, for your entertainment pleasure, the EIRL is pleased to present:

Trevor Foster Cup
Quarter Finals First Leg
Sunday, 12 May 2009
Orders Deadline: 1800 BST Saturday, 11 May 2009

(QF1) Northern Bulls of Burgas .v. CAU Madrid Rugby XIII
(QF2) Cumberland Falcons .v. Dublin Dynamo
(QF3) European Vagrants .v. Hull Kingston Redskins
(QF4) Rotterdam Rhinos .v. Wolverhampton Badgers

A reminder:

For those sides that are not playing - all players' health ratings will go down by one point, at no charge - but no physio or training will be allowed.

For those sides that are playing: no training allowed; physio will be available per standard rules and costs.

For all sides: No trades or player pool swaps allowed for anyone.

Kind regards,

Theo Kamis
EIRL Gaming Officer

Premiership Round 7...

...is complete - all should have their matches and form guides in hand now.

I'm totally knackered - so please forgive me if I do not post everything else until I get some sleep

CAU Madrid Rugby XIII 4 Cumberland Falcons 36 (H 0-16) (R 10-28)
Antonio is not pleased...but Mark certainly is...
Wolverhampton Badgers 32 Hull Kingston Redskins 12 (H 16-6) (R 24-22)
Padds never thrilled to visit the Midlands, but Brent is quite happy to host anyone from Humberside...
Saint-Maur Beavers 22 Zagreb Buffaloes 12 (H 16-6) (R 18-28)
It's all good for the home fans at Stade des Corneilles, but not so much for the braised Buffaloes...
Northern Bulls of Burgas 12 Monte-Carlo Martinis 20 (H 0-10) (R 10-20)
...speaking of braising, you have to use gin and vermouth to properly braise a bullock. Shaken or stirred, Patrick?
Rotterdam Rhinos 16 West Yorkshire Terriers 10 (H 8-6) (R 20-32)
Theo has no fingernails left, I'm sure - but the top scoring defence in EIRL does come in handy, much to the Terriers' chagrin (oh, so close!!!)
Gibralter Rockies 24 European Vagrants 10 (H 8-10) (R 40-28)
Pow! Biff! Socko! Vagrants get beaten up in the second half by Rockies' new motivational man, Adam West...
Tel-Aviv Nomads 14 Dublin Dynamo 6 (H 6-0) (R 26-4)
Clint is just as chagrined as Terriers are - twice losing games that were there for the taking...but Neil is just savouring the two points, and, as the raven might say, nothing more...

Kind regards,

Theo
EIRL Gaming Officer

EIRL Premiership Round Six Resultts

All:

I have had a very bad day today, and it's not getting better quite yet - nothing to do with anything in EIRL, and some sleep should help - so please accept my apologies en avance, and bear with me, if I am a bit brusque all this week

EIRL PREMIERSHIP - ROUND 6

Hull Kingston Redskins 14 CAU Madrid Rugby XIII 17 (H 8-8) (R 22-22)

Zagreb Buffaloes 10 Cumberland Falcons 32 (H 8-2) (R 4-20) (see note)

Monte-Carlo Martinis 30 Wolverhampton Badgers 10 (H 30-4) (R 16-12)

West Yorkshire Terriers 12 Saint-Maur Beavers 26 (H 12-16) (R 22-12)

European Vagrants 10 Northern Bulls of Burgas 16 (H 2-4) (R 18-14)

Dublin Dynamo 20 Rotterdam Rhinos 30 (H 20-24) (R 20-22)

Tel-Aviv Nomads 18 Gibralter Rockies 6 (H 6-0) (R 16-38)

And yes, I said that I had a very bad day, despite the results - you really don't, really really don't want to know why - but attempts to cheer me up would be welcome...articles from managers who haven't written much would help too...

...btw, Neil - thank you for your posts today - I read them before my bad day really started, and they are helping cheer me up even now...

...tables and stat attack are posted to the Yahoo! Group downloads page.

NOTE: Zagreb Buffaloes submitted orders late. Since they said "same again", that's what they got - at the standard 15 percent form penalty, and the standard fine, and the standard demerit mark. Since they also apologised to the EIRL Gaming Office for the late orders, they also get my thanks - that did help lift the grey a little bit from my face.

REMINDER: If you know you can't get full orders in on time, but can send "same again, please", it is to your benefit to do so. Yes, your player selection and tactics may not be optimal - but the 15 percent form penalty and the fine that you won't suffer will make up for that...

Kind regards,

Theo

EIRL Gaming Officer

EIRL Results - League Round 5

CAU Madrid XIII 14 Zagreb Buffaloes 46 (H 2-24) (R 20-16)
Zagreb rolls merrily along at the top of the tables...

Saint-Maur Beavers 38 Dublin Dynamo 18 (H 18-12) (R 18-14)
France can at least smile about something very positive for a moment, before worrying about retrieving the data recorders from AF 447...

Wolverhampton Badgers 4 European Vagrants 26 (H 4-14) (R 16-30)
Kevin always loves winning at Thornhill - being fourth in the tables is nice too...

Cumberland Falcons 25 West Yorkshire Terriers 12 (H 14-12) (R 46-0)
Drop goal, reserve wipeout - Falcons have now evened their record...

Hull Kingston Redskins 16 Monte-Carlo Martinis 18 (H 6-18) (R 10-20)
I'm begging both Patrick and Padds - please write up this game! (I can't tell the rest of you why - but trust me, I read the match report after seeing the scores - if I dared to publish the match report, I would - and Kevin should definitely put it in a new "Great Games" portion of the website - and quite possibly ahead of the Badgers / Chemics playoff encounters!)

Northern Bulls 26 Tel-Aviv Nomads 16 (H 12-6) (R 20-16)
See note, below - but I'm sure Rob is quite happy with the two points...

Rotterdam Rhinos 16 Gibralter Rockies 4 (H 8-4) (R 10-12)
With the reserves loss, Rhinos are no longer undefeated there - but, after the incidents and accidents, the hints and allegations, the fact that there wasn't a bench-clearing brawl at Stade van der Stok, the fact that a good game was played on both sides, and the fact that the senior Rhinos copped the two points, it was enough, for me, late in the evening...

Stat attack and tables will be published to the Files section of the Yahoo! Group and should be there now.

Notes:

Tel-Aviv Nomads failed to send in orders - they were given the standard 15 percent form penalty, and will be fined.

Next week:

ROUND SIX
Hull Kingston Redskins .v. CAU Madrid Rugby XIII
Zagreb Buffaloes .v. Cumberland Falcons
Monte-Carlo Martinis .v. Wolverhampton Badgers
West Yorkshire Terriers .v. Saint-Maur Beavers
European Vagrants .v. Northern Bulls of Burgas
Dublin Dynamo .v. Rotterdam Rhinos
Tel-Aviv Nomads .v. Gibralter Rockies

Orders deadline: 1800 BST, Saturday, 20 June 2009.

Kind regards,

Theo
EIRL Gaming Office

Trevor Foster Cup Results

Tel-Aviv Nomads 32 Northern Bulls 6 (H 16-6) (R 38-18)
Aggregate: Northern Bulls 46 Tel-Aviv Nomads 42

Saint-Maur Beavers 6 CAU Madrid XIII 22 (H 6-14) (R 14-20)
Aggregate: CAU Madrid XIII 42 Saint-Maur Beavers 12

Wolverhampton Badgers 16 Gibralter Rockies 6 (H 12-6) (R 26-40)
Aggregate: Wolverhampton Badgers 33 Gibralter Rockies 16

Comberland Falcons 19 Zagreb Buffaloes 14 (H 12-4) (R 42-12)
Aggregate: Cumberland Falcons 31 Zagreb Buffaloes 22

Hull Kingston Redskins 16 Monte-Carlo Martinis 8 (H 6-6) (R 18-14)
Aggregate: Hull Kingston Redskins 24 Monte-Carlo Martinis 15

European Vagrants 10 West Yorkshire Terriers 26 (H 0-16) (R 20-24)
Aggregate: European Vagrants 34 West Yorkshire Terriers 30

Trevor Foster Cup Quarterfinals - Leg 1: 12 July 2009 (after League Round 8):

(QF1) Northern Bulls of Burgas .v. CAU Madrid Rugby XIII
(QF2) Cumberland Falcons .v. Dublin Dynamo
(QF3) European Vagrants .v. Hull Kingston Redskins
(QF4) Rotterdam Rhinos .v. Wolverhampton Badgers

League Round 5 - 14 June 2009 - Orders deadline 13 June 2009, 1800 BST:

CAU Madrid Rugby XIII .v. Zagreb Buffaloes
Hull Kingston Redskins .v. Monte-Carlo Martinis
Cumberland Falcons .v. West Yorkshire Terriers
Wolverhampton Badgers .v. European Vagrants
Saint-Maur Beavers .v. Dublin Dynamo
Northern Bulls of Burgas .v. Tel-Aviv Nomads
Rotterdam Rhinos .v. Gibralter Rockies

Trevor Foster Cup First Round Second Leg Fixtures

SUNDAY 7 JUNE 2009

TREVOR FOSTER CUP FIRST ROUND SECOND LEG

Tel-Aviv Nomads (10) .v. Northern Bulls of Burgas (40)
Saint-Maur Beavers (6) .v. CAU Madrid Rugby XIII (20)
Wolverhampton Badgers (17) .v. Gibralter Rockies (10)
Cumberland Falcons (12) .v. Zagreb Buffaloes (8)
Hull Kingston Redskins (8) .v. Monte-Carlo Martinis (7)
European Vagrants (24) .v. West Yorkshire Terriers (4)

Team Orders Deadline: Saturday 6 June 2009, 1800 BST

Premiership Round 4 Results

Wow - two drops in one game!

There really wasn't a bad game in the lot - although Jerome and Mark could be safely forgiven for disagreeing with me on that point.

Right - I'm feeling tired (look at your clock, and likely subtract six hours (Patrick is in my time zone, if I recall, so if he did, I would wind up somewhere near Samoa!)), but happy with results at Brewery Road (how ironically appropriate for Danny Brough )...

...so, just the scores - the rest I'll sort out later (except for stat attack and tables - check the files section on Yahoo! Group):

Monte-Carlo Martinis 24 CAU Madrid Rugby XIII 10 (H 8-0) (R 22-6) A=14,862
West Yorkshire Terriers 8 Zagreb Buffaloes 14 (H 6-12) (R 32-14) A=17,509
European Vagrants 12 Hull Kingston Redskins 16 (H 4-10) (R 18-18) A=12,679
Dublin Dynamo 34 Cumberland Falcons 12 (H 12-4) (R 14-6) A=9,217
Tel-Aviv Nomads 10 Wolverhampton Badgers 22 (H 10-6) (R 26-20) A=10,852
Gibralter Rockies 32 Saint-Maur Beavers 8 (H 10-8) (R 18-24) A=11,801
Rotterdam Rhinos 25 Northern Bulls of Burgas 23 (H 14-14) (R 32-12) A=11,901

Kind regards - and please don't wake me until noon (my time, Kevin, not yours!),

Theo
EIRL Gaming Officer

Telegraph Reminder

A reminder to all teams that the cut-off point for Telegraph articles for payment this week is at 6pm UK time on Friday.

So far, there have been articles submitted from:

• European Vagrants (2)
• Monte-Carlo Martinis
• Rotterdam Rhinos

Remember, to qualify, it must be at least 200 words long, sent to the eirl group and include the word "Telegraph" in the Subject Line.

Stat Attack - Round Three

All stats so far can be found under the files section of the EIRL Yahoo! Group at http://sports.groups.yahoo.com/group/eirl/files/

Joel Tomkins of Zagreb Buffaloes leads the way by a country mile as the top try scorer so far with six in total, with Ben Cockayne, Brett Ferres, Peter Fox, Danny Hill, Ewan Dowes and Richard Horne lagging behind on three tries each. It's no surprise Zagreb are sitting comfortably in second place in the league with the highest number of points scored (94).

Table topping Saint-Maur Beavers head up the kicking charts with Thomas Bosc having kicked a remarkable 15 from 16 so far. Paul Cooke (Gibralter, 13/15), Paul Deacon (Zagreb, 13/20) follow on behind, although Deacon will want to look at improving that accuracy rating although he is top of the overall scoring charts with 34 points, level with Bosc with Rob Purdham (Rotterdam) a further four points behind.

In the battle for the MVP of EIRL 2009, and it is still early days, Deacon leads the way on five points, but it's not surprising to see Kevin Henderson, Thomas Bosc and Richard Horne (all Saint-Maur Beavers) just behind on four points showing strength throughout the entire Beavers squad.

Premiership Round Three Results

CAU Madrid Rugby XIII 28 West Yorkshire Terriers 12 (20-6) 14,236
Monte-Carlo Martinis 22 European Vagrants 26 (10-10) 15,308
Zagreb Buffaloes 42 Dublin Dynamo 6 (20-0) 18,455
Hull Kingston Redskins 12 Tel-Aviv Nomads 26 (8-20) 7,383
Cumberland Falcons 26 Gibralter Rockies 34 (12-22) 11,105
Wolverhampton Badgers 6 Rotterdam Rhinos 40 (0-20) 11,226
Saint-Maur Beavers 24 Northern Bulls of Burgas 14 (14-10) 13,207

RESERVES
Boadilla Miners 16 Huddersfield Hitmen 30
Monte-Carlo Martinis Reserves 18 European Vagrants 'A' 32
Sisak Cougars 30 Dublin Dynamo Reserves 34
Torrevieja Titans 6 Haifa Jaffas 26
Westmoreland Hawks 24 Monkies on the Rock 18
Wrexham Badgers 14 Rochdale Rhinos 18
Vincennes Wild Boars 32 Small Bullocks 6

Tables and Stat Attack Excels will be uploaded to the Files section of the Yahoo! Group shortly - if any of you need them posted in another format, or emailed to you in another format, please let me know.

The highlight of the tables - our Gallic representatives are table-topping both the senior table and the reserves table - congratulations, Monsieur Gilbon!

Next week - Round Four, to be followed by the second leg of the Trevor Foster Cup the week after:

ROUND FOUR
Monte-Carlo Martinis .v. CAU Madrid Rugby XIII
West Yorkshire Terriers .v. Zagreb Buffaloes
European Vagrants .v. Hull Kingston Redskins
Dublin Dynamo .v. Cumberland Falcons
Tel-Aviv Nomads .v. Wolverhampton Badgers
Gibralter Rockies .v. Saint-Maur Beavers
Rotterdam Rhinos .v. Northern Bulls of Burgas

Team Orders deadline - 1800 BST, 30 May 2009.

Don't forget - no training will be allowed during a Cup week, except for physio - so if you want to improve your squad in that manner, do it this week - and that deadline is: 1800 BST, Wednesday, 27 May 2009.

No missed orders, no errors - merci mille fois, messieurs...

Kind regards,

Theo
EIRL Gaming Officer

Trevor Foster Cup Form Guide Query answered

All:

To anticipate everyone's potential queries re: updated form guides, a query from Patrick:

Can you check, seems like my form guide was not updated to reflect my cup game. My rested players had a health reduction, but my form for all players is unchanged from league game #2. Also, my record says 1-1, (but not sure if that would change to include the cup or not). So, I am mostly going on form unchanged for all first team & reserve players.

I was told by Kevin, when running Cup ties, not to allow the sim to update stats, but to manually reduce health for rested players after the games were played.

As a result, form did not change, regardless of how well (or how poorly) your side did. And neither did your records on your form guide.

All rested players for teams that played did receive a health reduction of 1. No other health ratings changed, either up or down.

However, since neither Dublin Dynamo and Rotterdam Rhinos played, all players on these teams had their health ratings reduced by 1 - but were not allowed to pay for, or use, any physio.

And of course, the tracking of the Cup results is to be done manually, and separately from the Premiership.

So, for your reference, here's what is in store for the second leg (home side first for the second leg):

Tel-Aviv Nomads 10 v Northern Bulls of Burgas 40 - Tel-Aviv needs to win by 31 points to advance to the quarterfinals.
Saint-Maur Beavers 6 v CAU Madrid Rugby XIII 20 - Saint-Maur needs to win by 15 in order to advance to the quarterfinals.
Wolverhampton Badgers 17 v Gibralter Rockies 10 - Gibralter needs to win by 8 in order to advance to the quarterfinals.
Cumberland Falcons 12 v Zagreb Buffaloes 8 - Zagreb needs to win by 5 in order to advance to the quarterfinals.
Hull Kingston Redskins 8 v Monte-Carlo Martinis 7 - Monte-Carlo needs to win by 2 in order to advance to the quarterfinals.
European Vagrants 24 v West Yorkshire Terriers 4 - West Yorkshire needs to win by 21 in order to advance to the quarterfinals.

And, once more, the tie-break procedures:

In the event of a tie after the second leg, the following shall apply, in order:

• The team scoring the greater number of points away from home shall be deemed the winner;
• Golden Point extra time of a maximum of 10 minutes per half shall be played in any instance where the score is tied and the number of points scored away from home is equal;
• The drawing of lots shall be made by an independent third party where none of the above manage to separate the sides.

Kind regards,

Theo
EIRL Gaming Office

Trevor Foster Cup First Round First Leg Results

Northern Bulls of Burgas 40 .v. Tel-Aviv Nomads 10 (12-6) 14,216
CAU Madrid Rugby XIII 20 .v. Saint-Maur Beavers 6 (6-0) 19,095
Gibralter Rockies 10 .v. Wolverhampton Badgers 17 (10-10) 9,549
Zagreb Buffaloes 8 .v. Cumberland Falcons 12 (2-6) 21,042
Monte-Carlo Martinis 7 .v. Hull Kingston Redskins 8 (6-0) 14,385
West Yorkshire Terriers 4 .v. European Vagrants 24 (0-14) 18,379

NEXT FIXTURES:

EIRL PREMIERSHIP - ROUND 3

CAU Madrid Rugby XIII .v. West Yorkshire Terriers
Monte-Carlo Martinis .v. European Vagrants
Zagreb Buffaloes .v. Dublin Dynamo
Hull Kingston Redskins .v. Tel-Aviv Nomads
Cumberland Falcons .v. Gibralter Rockies
Wolverhampton Badgers .v. Rotterdam Rhinos
Saint-Maur Beavers .v. Northern Bulls of Burgas

Team Orders Deadline: Saturday 23 May 2009, 1800 BST

Amendment to Finance Rules

The following has today been added to the EIRL Finance rules for 2009.

NEGATIVE TEAM FINANCE BALANCE

Should your team spend it's £1,000,000 team budget and then enter into a negative balance, the following shall apply:

1) Your most recent training will be reversed and the funds refunded back to your team account up to the amount of the account deficit (i.e. if you are £50,000 in arrears, only training up to this value will be reversed, not the entire request). You will NOT be able to re-use the training point regardless of funds being available at a later point. This will not be applied to physiotherapy. The discretion as to what player will have training reversed where there are more than one player with an equal training cost will lie at the discretion of the League President, in conjunction with the Training Commissioner.

2) In the event of a future breach which results in your team entering into a negative balance again during the course of the season, (1) above shall be applied again and your team shall incur a 1pt penalty from your league total. Future breaches shall result in a 2pt penalty being applied.

3) In the event that a coach who has been penalised with penalties (1) and/or (2) above relinquishes their team and a new coach takes over, the penalties previously imposed shall be reversed (the training point will be restored for later use - but will still have to be re-paid and the league total points shall be restored).

All of the above shall take effect from 15 May 2009 and shall not be applied retrospectively except in exceptional and specific circumstances.

Vagrants head to Yorkshire

With the league campaign back on hold, coach Kevin Brock has named a weakened side for the European Vagrants Trevor Foster Cup First Round First Leg match against early pacesetters West Yorkshire Terriers.

With a number of minor niggles and injuries amongst the squad, Brock feels this is the perfect opportunity to give some of the younger players their chance to shine but is also cautious of the dangers the Terriers might well pose.

"We know Daniel will be looking to win, but that said, he's also already come out to say that the league is their main objective, and that certainly has to be our aim here too.

"A few players have took a few knocks over the last couple of weeks and we've had some tough games, so it's only fair we give some players some first team experience. I think any of our players can go out and perform a credible job, and although it's a steep learning curve, if I didn't think they could cope I wouldn't have them in the squad, never mind in the 17."

Brock was however mindful of not devaluing the Premier EIRL Cup competition, this season experimenting with two-legged matches during the early rounds: "As EIRL President, and as a coach, I don't want the competition to become a farce as with some lesser competitions in other sports, but two legs gives us a good opportunity to try things out and our intention remains to reach the quarter-finals. Unless we get a complete pasting in the first leg, or we are considerably in front, I envisage fielding as strong a side as possible in the return leg in Bordeaux."

Vagrants suffer mixed start

Two games into the regular league season and it's played two, won one for a Vagrants side with high hopes of making it through to the play-offs and upwards in the newly enlarged EIRL Premiership.

An opening day victory over the Tel-Aviv Nomads got things off to the perfect start in Volgograd with Dixon and Paleaaesina putting them in control early on and 12-0 up at half time.

Shane Perry added a further try in the second half, and despite Terry Newton scoring for the Nomads, the result was, by this point almost a foregone conclusion, later confirmed by Danny Hill's last minute try for a 24-4 win against a team many would see as strong contenders for the title.

With confidence high, the team were on the road and off to the Ukraine where they faced CAU Madrid in Kharkiv. Another flying start, this time after just 66 seconds saw Shane Perry score his second try of the campaign and Kevin Sinfield took on the kicking role to add the extras but the lead lasted under two minutes before Sam Moa's try and a Iestyn Harris conversion levelled matters.

A Harris penalty on 10 minutes then put Vagrants behind for the first time this season, before two Sinfield penalties restored a two-point advantage just before half-time.

The second half started well for Sinfield as the Madrid side started to lose their heads and two became four and a 12-8 lead just seconds into the second half. But four points is never enough so early into the game, and Madrid deservedly hit back to assume the lead on 49 minutes with Karl Fitzpatrick surging through the static Vagrants defence and the video referee being called, mainly so the Vagrants team could see in full glorious technicolour where they had gone wrong.

They seemed to have learnt their lesson when Sinfield again levelled matters, but it was only a short lived reprieve as Thackray restored the Madrid lead, but with the conversion missed, the chance was still there.

On 74 minutes however, despite throwing everything at the Spaniards, that chance was gone.

Stephen Wild took advantage of some sloppy defence to score under the posts and Harris made the difference a mammoth ten points, before victory was made all the sweeter in the final minutes with Rikki Sheriffe finishing off a flowing Spanish attack for a 30-14 win.

Trevor Foster Cup First Round First Leg Attendances

TREVOR FOSTER CUP FIRST ROUND FIRST LEG

Northern Bulls of Burgas .v. Tel-Aviv Nomads 14,216
CAU Madrid Rugby XIII .v. Saint-Maur Beavers 19,095
Gibralter Rockies .v. Wolverhampton Badgers 9,549
Zagreb Buffaloes .v. Cumberland Falcons 21,042
Monte-Carlo Martinis .v. Hull Kingston Redskins 14,385
West Yorkshire Terriers .v. European Vagrants 18,379

All attendances have received a 10% uplift due to being cup matches. Quarter Finals will receive a 25% uplift. The level of uplift for the semi-finals and final are yet to be determined.

No attendance comparisons will be considered for cup matches.

Premiership Round Two Results, Next Games on Schedule

EIRL Premiership Round Two Results (and estimated attendances):

European Vagrants 14 CAU Madrid XIII 30 (10-8) 13,344
Dublin Dynamo 0 West Yorkshire Terriers 24 (0-14) 21,079**
Tel-Aviv Nomads 24 Monte-Carlo Martinis 20 (18-14) 12,150## <>
Gibralter Rockies 26 Zagreb Buffaloes 30 (12-6) 13,387
Northern Bulls 6 Cumberland Falcons 26 (0-16) 13,276
Saint-Maur Beavers 24 Wolverhampton Badgers 6 (14-0) 16,405
Rotterdam Rhinos 24 Hull Kingston Redskins 10 (12-4) 12,351

** Season HIGH 21,079 (beating the 20,682 for CAU Madrid Rugby XIII v Dublin Dynamo match in Round 1)

## Season LOW 12,150 (beating the 15,602 for Cumberland Falcons v Wolverhampton Badgers match in Round 1)
<> Note: Orders from Tel-Aviv Nomads were not received; a 15 percent form penalty was applied, and they were fined £60,000.

NEXT GAMES: TREVOR FOSTER CUP FIRST ROUND FIRST LEG

First Round First Leg: Sunday, 17 May 2009
Orders deadline: Saturday, 16 May, 1800 BST

Byes: Rotterdam Rhinos, Dublin Dynamo (EHT Finalists)

Northern Bulls of Burgas .v. Tel-Aviv Nomads
CAU Madrid Rugby XIII .v. Saint-Maur Beavers
Gibralter Rockies .v. Wolverhampton Badgers
Zagreb Buffaloes .v. Cumberland Falcons
Monte-Carlo Martinis .v. Hull Kingston Redskins
West Yorkshire Terriers .v. European Vagrants

Just a reminder on training this week:

• No training shall be permitted in the week prior to cup games, however, physiotherapy will be permitted for all teams involved in a cup game that week. Teams without a cup game will not be permitted to use physiotherapy (but will, by having a week off from games have the health of all players reduced by one week).
• Injured players who are specifically rested (see Team Orders rules) will receive a reduction in their health of 1 week.
• Physiotherapy may be used to treat players with a health rating of 3 or more.
• Once a player has recovered to a health rating of 2 or less he may not be subject to physiotherapy.
• Physiotherapy will be charged at £45,000 per point. There is no maximum to the amount of physiotherapy that can be applied in each week, however, only one point may be used per player. You may use physiotherapy in conjunction with resting a player.
• Please note: you may only use funds that are directly available to your team to pay for training or physiotherapy. In the event that you overspend, you will have the training refused and will incur a warning or training ban.

Good luck to all teams this week!

Team Orders Received - League Round Two

So far, I have received orders from the following sides:

Gibralter Rockies
Monte-Carlo Martinis
Rotterdam Rhinos
Wolverhampton Badgers
Zagreb Buffaloes

Deadline is 1800 BST Saturday, 9 May 2009.

Also, for those sides that have had training orders actioned this week (and everyone else needs to read this as well):

You should receive shortly your updated form guides reflecting your training, including resetting of form to 100, from the following name and email address:

"EIRL Gaming Office" <EIRL_Gaming_ ____ Office@gmx. com> (note - spaces added for spambot foiling purposes)

The email message header will say: "IIRL: Form Guide"

If this works, I will automatically be sending form guides and match reports directly from the sim after running games on the week as well - in this event, the message header will say "IIRL: (Team a) v (Team b) .txt"

If anyone has a problem, please let me know - thanks!

Kind regards,

Theo
EIRL Gaming Office

Premiership Round One Results

ROUND ONE
CAU Madrid Rugby XIII 6 Dublin Dynamo 36 (6-14) 20,682
European Vagrants 24 Tel-Aviv Nomads 4 (12-0) 18,765
West Yorkshire Terriers 30 Gibralter Rockies 18 (16-6) 16,682
Monte-Carlo Martinis 22 Rotterdam Rhinos 8 (6-6) 17,118
Zagreb Buffaloes 22 Northern Bulls of Burgas 26 (16-16) 20,077
Hull Kingston Redskins 18 Saint-Maur Beavers 26 (6-12) 19,950
Cumberland Falcons 14 Wolverhampton Badgers 14 (8-14) 15,602

NEXT FIXTURES - ROUND TWO
European Vagrants .v. CAU Madrid Rugby XIII
Dublin Dynamo .v. West Yorkshire Terriers
Tel-Aviv Nomads .v. Monte-Carlo Martinis
Gibralter Rockies .v. Zagreb Buffaloes
Rotterdam Rhinos .v. Hull Kingston Redskins
Northern Bulls of Burgas .v. Cumberland Falcons
Saint-Maur Beavers .v. Wolverhampton Badgers

Team Orders Deadline: 1800hrs UK Time, Saturday 9th May 2009

Trevor Foster Cup First Round Draw

The draw was this morning made for the First Round of the Trevor Foster Cup. Dublin Dynamo, who won the Ellery Hanley Trophy, and Rotterdam Rhinos, who were runners-up, received byes to the Quarter Finals.

Northern Bulls of Burgas .v. Tel-Aviv Nomads
CAU Madrid Rugby XIII .v. Saint-Maur Beavers
Gibralter Rockies .v. Wolverhampton Badgers
Zagreb Buffaloes .v. Cumberland Falcons
Monte-Carlo Martinis .v. Hull Kingston Redskins
West Yorkshire Terriers .v. European Vagrants

First Leg as indicated above.

Ties to be played over two legs on 17 May and 7 June 2009.

Ellery Hanley Trophy Play Off and Final

ELLERY HANLEY TROPHY FINAL
Rotterdam Rhinos 18 Dublin Dynamo 22 (18-12)

ELLERY HANLEY TROPHY THIRD/FOURTH PLACE PLAY OFF
Gibralter Rockies 18 Zagreb Buffaloes 34 (14-22)

TRIAL MATCH - SPANISH KINGS CUP
CAU Madrid Rugby XIII 6 Hull Kingston Redskins 24 (0-18)

NEXT FIXTURES

SUNDAY 3 MAY 2009

EIRL PREMIERSHIP
ROUND ONE
CAU Madrid Rugby XIII .v. Dublin Dynamo
European Vagrants .v. Tel-Aviv Nomads
West Yorkshire Terriers .v. Gibralter Rockies
Monte-Carlo Martinis .v. Rotterdam Rhinos
Zagreb Buffaloes .v. Northern Bulls of Burgas
Hull Kingston Redskins .v. Saint-Maur Beavers
Cumberland Falcons .v. Wolverhampton Badgers

Team Orders Deadline: Saturday 2 May 2009, 1800 BST

Ellery Hanley Trophy Semi Finals

ELLERY HANLEY TROPHY SEMI FINALS
(SF1) Gibralter Rockies 8 Rotterdam Rhinos 14 (0-12)
(SF2) Zagreb Buffaloes 6 Dublin Dynamo 8 (0-6)

TRIAL MATCH
European Vagrants 28 Northern Bulls of Burgas 22 (14-10)

NEXT FIXTURES - 29 APRIL 2009

ELLERY HANLEY TROPHY FINAL
ROTTERDAM RHINOS .v. DUBLIN DYNAMO
at Commerzbank Arena

Team Orders Deadline: 28 April, 1800 BST

Ellery Hanley Trophy Quarter Finals Second Leg

Ellery Hanley Trophy: Quarter Finals Second Leg

(QF1) Gibralter Rockies (14) 22 European Vagrants (6) 28 (18-18)
Gibralter Rockies win 36-34 on aggregate

(QF2) Saint-Maur Beavers (14) 6 Rotterdam Rhinos (22) 38 (0-20)
Rotterdam Rhinos win 60-20 on aggregate

(QF3) Zagreb Buffaloes (26) 30 Cumberland Falcons (10) 30 (30-14)
Zagreb Buffaloes win 56-40 on aggregate

(QF4) Hull Kingston Redskins (14) 20 Dublin Dynamo (29) 26 (12-14)
Dublin Dynamo win 55-34 on aggregate

NEXT FIXTURES - 26 APRIL 2009

Ellery Hanley Trophy: Semi Finals at Amsterdam ArenA
(SF1) Gibralter Rockies .v. Rotterdam Rhinos
(SF2) Zagreb Buffaloes .v. Dublin Dynamo

Orders deadline: 1800 BST Saturday, 25 April

Reminder: All sides not currently in the Ellery Hanley Trophy may keep busy by arranging friendlies. These should be arranged privately where possible and confirmed to Kevin Brock no later than the team orders deadline stated above.

Vagrants taste first ever Pre-Season Cup loss

European Vagrants 6 Gibralter Rockies 14 (HT: 0-6)

Volkswagen Arena, Wolfsburg

Reigning Ellery Hanley Trophy holders European Vagrants encountered their first ever Pre-Season Trophy loss at the hands of a committed Rockies side in Wolfsburg today.

After a comfortable victory in their recent friendly, many of the Vagrants faithful may have felt this would be a walk in the park, especially with the Rockies quoted by Wilsons Bookies of Gibralter offering odds of 66/1 to lift the trophy prior to the kick-off.

Rob Jackson kept his place in the side for the game from the injured Kirk Dixon in an otherwise unchanged line-up but the Vagrants were behind after just 70 seconds after the Rockies took full advantage of Danny Hills knock-on to set up Ian Hardman to cross with Paul Cooke adding the extras.

Despite much posturing from both sides, that was to be the only score in the opening half, as both sides seemed to struggle despite near perfect ball handling conditions, the closest the Vagrants coming being a turned-down video decision on 35 minutes for failing to ground the ball correctly in a somewhat debatable decision.

The Rockies extended their lead early in the second half with a Paul Cooke penalty after Vagrants were again harshly penalised for a play the ball infringement that only the referee appeared to spot, but it's the man in the middle that matters, even if it's no clearer on a later video replay.

Despite both teams having chances it was finally to be the Vagrants time to get on the scoresheet on 58 minutes when Calderwood surged through a static Rockies defence before putting a clever kick through which Rob Jackson latched onto, and this time there was no debate as the referee signalled immediately for the try. Burrow converted the simple extras and suddenly the game was back on.

The game though took a further turn on 67 minutes when Graeme Horne instinctively lunged through some lacklustre defence before offloading to Paul Cooke who bundled over in the corner and then converted the difficult chance off the touchline to restore the eight point difference between the sides which was to last through to the final hooter.

Whilst it may only technically be half-time, Vagrants coach Kevin Brock knows they will have to improve for the second leg if they are to progress to the semi-finals and retain their grip on the trophy:

"It wasn't brilliant and it looked like both sides had some nerves out there today and the completion rates and error count weren't what we'd expect but we'll keep plugging away and working hard on the training field and maybe try one or two things out in the second leg with nothing to lose.

I'd love to keep hold of the trophy for another year but we have to look at the wider picture, and that is a good run in the league. Everything we can do towards that aim is a positive, and I've already approached another team about a trial game on semi-final day in case we don't get through.

The Rockies picked up one or two injuries out there today as well which might well play in our favour come Thursday but I know Dave (Wilson) will have the team fired up and we have to match that, if not beat it".

Ellery Hanley Trophy Statistics

Statistics for the Ellery Hanley Trophy up to and including Quarter Finals, First Leg (3 matches)

TRIES
Gareth Raynor (Zagreb Buffaloes) 4
Richard Horne (Saint-Maur Beavers) 4
Jon Wells (European Vagrants) 3
Bryn Hargreaves (Cumberland Falcons) 3
15 players on two tries each.

GOALS
Michael Dobson (Dublin Dynamo) 15/16 (93.75%)
Thomas Bosc (Saint-Maur Beavers) 10/12 (83.33%)
Rob Burrow (European Vagrants) 10/13 (76.92%)
Paul Cooke (Gibralter Rockies) 9/12 (75.00%)
David March (Zagreb Buffaloes) 8/9 (88.89%)

PLAYER OF THE TOURNAMENT
Ewan Dowes (Gibralter Rockies) 5 (3 games)
Stuart Fielden (Zagreb Buffaloes) 5 (3 games)
Gareth Hock (Saint-Maur Beavers) 5 (3 games)
Adam Peek (Saint-Maur Beavers) 4 (2 games)
Michael Dobson (Dublin Dynamo) 4 (3 games)
Martin Gleeson (Dublin Dynamo) 4 (3 games)
13 players on 3 points each.

Ellery Hanley Trophy Quarter Finals First Leg

Ellery Hanley Trophy: Quarter Finals First Leg

European Vagrants 6 Gibralter Rockies 14 (0-6)
Rotterdam Rhinos 22 Saint-Maur Beavers 14 (0-14)
Cumberland Falcons 10 Zagreb Buffaloes 26 (6-10)
Dublin Dynamo 29 Hull Kingston Redskins 14 (14-10)

NEXT FIXTURES - 22 APRIL 2009

Ellery Hanley Trophy: Quarter Finals Second Leg

(QF1) Gibralter Rockies (14) .v. European Vagrants (6)
(QF2) Saint-Maur Beavers (14) .v. Rotterdam Rhinos (22)
(QF3) Zagreb Buffaloes (26) .v. Cumberland Falcons (10)
(QF4) Hull Kingston Redskins (14) .v. Dublin Dynamo (29)

Orders deadline: 1800 BST Tuesday, 21 April

Reminder: All sides not currently in the Ellery Hanley Trophy may keep busy by arranging friendlies. These should be arranged privately where possible and confirmed to Kevin Brock no later than the team orders deadline stated above.

Ellery Hanley First Round Second Leg

West Yorkshire Terriers (8) 4 Saint-Maur Beavers (25) 22 (4-4)
Saint-Maur Beavers win 47-12 on aggregate

European Vagrants (36) 26 Tel-Aviv Nomads (26) 24 (6-20)
European Vagrants win 62-50 on aggregate

Northern Bulls of Burgas (4) 10 Zagreb Buffaloes (22) 30 (10-12)
Zagreb Buffaloes win 52-14 on aggregate

CAU Madrid Rugby XIII (27) 10 Dublin Dynamo (14) 24 (10-4)
Dublin Dynamo win 38-37 on aggregate

Wolverhampton Badgers (6) 12 Gibralter Rockies (12) 24 (12-12)
Gibralter Rockies win 36-18 on aggregate

Cumberland Falcons (18) 18 Monte-Carlo Martinis (8) 14 (6-2)
Cumberland Falcons win 36-22 on aggregate

Quarter Finals First Leg - 19 April 2009

(QF1) European Vagrants .v. Gibralter Rockies
(QF2) Rotterdam Rhinos .v. Saint-Maur Beavers
(QF3) Cumberland Falcons .v. Zagreb Buffaloes
(QF4) Dublin Dynamo .v. Hull Kingston Redskins

Team Orders Deadline: Saturday 18 April 2009, 1800 BST

Cup Rules - Tied Games

In the event of a tie after the second leg, the following shall apply, in order:

• The team scoring the greater number of points away from home shall be deemed the winner;
• Golden Point extra time of a maximum of 10 minutes per half shall be played in any instance where the score is tied and the number of points scored away from home is equal;
• The drawing of lots shall be made by an independent third party where none of the above manage to separate the sides.

For one leg matches, the match shall go immediately to Golden Point Extra Time in the event of a tie.

These shall apply to both the Ellery Hanley Trophy and Trevor Foster Cup.

Ellery Hanley First Round First Leg

Byes: Rotterdam Rhinos, Hull Kingston Redskins

Saint-Maur Beavers 25 West Yorkshire Terriers 8 (6-6)
Tel-Aviv Nomads 26 European Vagrants 36 (12-14)
Zagreb Buffaloes 22 Northern Bulls of Burgas 4 (12-0)
Dublin Dynamo 14 CAU Madrid Rugby XIII 27 (12-14)
Gibralter Rockies 12 Wolverhampton Badgers 6 (8-0)
Monte-Carlo Martinis 8 Cumberland Falcons 18 (6-4)

Next Matches - 16 April

West Yorkshire Terriers (8) .v. Saint-Maur Beavers (25)
European Vagrants (36) .v. Tel-Aviv Nomads (26)
Northern Bulls of Burgas (4) .v. Zagreb Buffaloes (22)
CAU Madrid Rugby XIII (27) .v. Dublin Dynamo (14)
Wolverhampton Badgers (6) .v. Gibralter Rockies (12)
Cumberland Falcons (18) .v. Monte-Carlo Martinis (8)

Team Orders Deadline is 1800 BST on Wednesday 15 April 2009

Trial Game Results - 10 April 2009

CHARITY SHIELD (League Champions v Trevor Foster Cup Winners)
Zagreb Buffaloes 20 Tel-Aviv Nomads 4 (8-4) (at Stade de France)

Zagreb Buffaloes are Charity Shield winners for 2009. Congratulations to Steve Hudson on his success.

Dublin Dynamo 27 Hull Kingston Redskins 22 (12-18)
Gibralter Rockies 12 European Vagrants 28 (12-12)
Monte-Carlo Martinis 12 Rotterdam Rhinos 24 (0-6)
Saint-Maur Beavers 18 West Yorkshire Terriers 32 (6-8)

Next Games:

ELLERY HANLEY TROPHY FIRST ROUND FIRST LEG

13 APRIL

Saint-Maur Beavers .v. West Yorkshire Terriers
Tel-Aviv Nomads .v. European Vagrants
Zagreb Buffaloes .v. Northern Bulls of Burgas
Dublin Dynamo .v. CAU Madrid Rugby XIII
Gibralter Rockies .v. Wolverhampton Badgers
Monte-Carlo Martinis .v. Cumberland Falcons

Byes: Rotterdam Rhinos, Hull Kingston Redskins

Team Orders Deadline: 1800 BST on Sunday 12 April 2009 unless otherwise stated.

Trial Game Results - 7 April 2009

CAU Madrid Rugby XIII 0 Wolverhampton Badgers 34 (0-8)
European Vagrants 4 Rotterdam Rhinos 28 (4-28) (in Las Vegas)
Gibralter Rockies 8 Tel-Aviv Nomads 14 (6-12) (in Khandahar)
Hull Kingston Redskins 15 Cumberland Falcons 16 (14-12)
West Yorkshire Terriers 16 Monte-Carlo Martinis 23 (12-16)
Zagreb Buffaloes 10 Dublin Dynamo 16 (6-4)

The next games will be played on Good Friday, 10 April.

The team orders deadline will be 6pm Thursday.

Trial Game Results - 4 April 2009

CAU Madrid Rugby XIII 16 Tel-Aviv Nomads 26 (6-22)
Cumberland Falcons 28 Zagreb Buffaloes 14 (20-6)
Dublin Dynamo 4 Monte-Carlo Martinis 14 (0-12)
European Vagrants 32 Saint-Maur Beavers 16 (26-12)
Hull Kingston Redskins 2 West Yorkshire Terriers 22 (2-12)
Rotterdam Rhinos 36 Gibralter Rockies 16 (16-10)

The next games will be played on Tuesday 4 April.

The team orders deadline will be 6pm Monday.

Change to TRADES deadline

To streamline co-ordination between Dave, Patrick, Theo and myself, I have taken the decision to bring forward the TRADES deadline by 24 hours to 1800 UK time on TUESDAYS.

All other deadlines remain unaffected, unless otherwise stated.

This change will be reflected on the next website update.

Pre-Season Update

Apologies for the lack of recent updates, however things have moved at a very fast pace in recent weeks and as soon as I remember to do an update, something develops or changes.

Anyway. the player retention, draft, meat market and free trades periods have now been completed and my thanks are given to Patrick for his hard work in completing this so effectively. The database has now been converted into MS Access and (we think) is functional ... a brief test threw up some errors, which have been resolved, and a test game eventually worked so hopefully any glitches have been resolved.

There is now a short break before we start with trial games, the first of which are scheduled for 4 April. This gives our new Gaming Officer Theo Kamis time to familiarise himself with the functioning of the sim and to get accustomed to how best to use it. Although this is over a week away, I will not be moving this, or any other dates forward.

The next few weeks will see a very busy period with games on 4, 7, 10 April (trial games) and then the Ellery Hanley Trophy kicking off on Easter Monday, April 13, with further games on April 16, 19, 22, 26 with the final at the Commerzbank Arena on April 29. Teams that are knocked out of the EHT may, if they wish, arrange further trial games with teams who are not involved in the competition.

Check out the season calendar on the website for all dates for the 2009 season.

There is a small rule change to both the EHT and TFC. With the original group stage, the intention was to award teams an additional £75,000 for reaching the knock-out stages. This will now ONLY be awarded to teams reaching the Semi-Finals of each competition.

To clarify on the training rules, it currently reads:
"Teams may use a maximum of 10 training points during the course of the regular season and these will be awarded to all teams after the completion of League Round 1."

The regular season is determined as being any league game PRIOR to the play-offs, i.e. the first 13 games, and then following the split, the six games after that.

In addition, TWO random training points will now be awarded (one point on two occasions) to compensate for the increase in games from that originally published.

These changes will be reflected on the website shortly.

With regards to Training, Dave Wilson has now been appointed as Training Officer and my thanks go to Dave for his offer of support.

May I also take this opportunity to remind all teams to carefully look at the rules, especially around team orders, training and trades. There have been a lot of changes since 2008.

May I also advise that if you decide to utilise any perceived loophole within the rules, and it is felt that utilisation of this is "against the spirit" of fair and even competition, your request may be rejected.

May I wish all teams the very best for the coming season!

A Look at the EIRL Sides for 2009

Now that the Meat Market is done, we can now take a look at the current state of all fourteen of the EIRL sides. This of course will not include the Player Pool swap period now underway - but this is what we have to work with.

My analysis will consist of looking at three factors: salary cap utilization, strength of total squad (T27 rating), and strength of best 17 players (T17 rating). The first is self-explanatory; the other two require a bit of explanation.

Using a proprietary rating formula, I have rated all players in the database. This rating is heavily weighted towards attack and defence ratings, with consideration for kicking and temp ratings also made. No consideration was made for goal kicking ratings, as I deemed it likely that all sides would have at least one 7 rated goal kicker - therefore, your own ratings might be different. No consideration for the age of any player was made.

The table I created, sorted by Full Team Factor:

Team	Salary	Cap Space	Avg Rat 27	Avg Rat Top 17	Full Team Factor	Top 17 Factor	Sal Utiliz Factor	FTF Rank	T17 Rank	Sal Ut Rank
Wolv	1,999,000	1,000	6.30	6.90	1.054	1.032	1.000	1	2	1
SM	1,997,000	3,000	6.22	6.79	1.041	1.016	0.999	2	5	2
T-A	1,996,000	4,000	6.20	7.03	1.038	1.052	0.998	3	1	3
Zag	1,959,500	40,500	6.15	6.78	1.029	1.014	0.980	4	6	4
Cumb	1,930,500	69,500	6.12	6.81	1.024	1.019	0.965	5	4	8
CAU	1,938,500	61,500	6.10	6.69	1.021	1.001	0.969	6	8	5
MC	1,935,500	64,500	6.07	6.84	1.016	1.023	0.968	7	3	7
Euro	1,938,000	62,000	6.06	6.76	1.014	1.011	0.969	8	7	6
Rott	1,858,500	141,500	5.89	6.53	0.986	0.977	0.929	9	9	10
HKR	1,875,500	124,500	5.86	6.51	0.981	0.974	0.938	10	10	9
Gib	1,814,500	185,500	5.75	6.51	0.962	0.974	0.907	11	11	12
W York	1,829,500	170,500	5.68	6.48	0.951	0.970	0.915	12	13	11
Dub	1,804,500	195,500	5.65	6.44	0.945	0.964	0.902	13	14	13
Nort	1,762,500	237,500	5.61	6.50	0.939	0.973	0.881	14	12	14
			5.98	6.68

Full team factor is merely a team's Avg Rat 27 (a team's average rating for all its players), divided by the average of all teams' full team factors - 1 is average, above 1 is better, below 1 is worse.

Top 17 factor is merely a team's Avg Rat Top 17 (a team's average rating of its top 17 rated players, without regard to whether this would be a particular team's actual starting XVII, divided by the average of all teams' top 17 factors - again, 1 is average, above 1 is better, below 1 is worse.

So, what does all of this mean? Given the factors, it appears that there are several categories of teams:

• Category I - Sides that are expected to make the playoffs, and whose managers should be sacked if they don't (unless their players all become quadriplegic (and even then, they should make the playoffs - see the Academy Award-winning documentary, Murderball ).
  
• Category II - Sides that should make the playoffs, but might lose out if they aren't careful (or get just a little bit unlucky).
• Category III - Sides that might make the playoffs, but need some very good luck to make it - as of now, they won't.
• Category IV - Sides that, if they do make the playoffs, their home cities would declare a three day, totally drunken holiday (mind you all EIRL cities would declare a drunken holiday for making the playoffs, but these cities would really mean it).

Here are the managers, in team alphabetical order, and which category I see their sides in:

Antonio: Category II - There are only three sides that I rate Category I - and, happily for Antonio, if CAU Madrid doesn't make the playoffs, they aren't one of them. Their side is virtually set - with just £61,000 in free cap space, they can't really improve their side too much. The fact that CAU Madrid's Top 17 factor is significantly lower than their Full Team factor is a little disconcerting - what that may mean is, if no one gets any serious injuries in EIRL this season, their starters, being slightly weaker than most of their top 8 competitors, may not deliver the results that Antonio expects.

Mark: Category II - Cumberland is in better shape than CAU Madrid in both metrics, particularly the Top 17 factor - but Mark dares not rest on any laurels. With just under £70,000 in free cap space, the Falcons' roster is basically set. And so should their playoff chances....

Clint: Category IV - Dublin may have had the best draft in EIRL, but their Full Team factor is next to worst in EIRL. And, although their Top 17 factor is much better relatively compared to the Full Team factor, they're dead last in this metric. But, with nearly £200,000 in free cap space, Dynamo may not be done remodeling their roster - and they really do have a chance to make the playoffs - just not as much as Clint would like.

Kevin: Category II - Vagrants are eighth in Full Team factor, seventh in Top 17 factor, and have just over £60,000 in free cap space remaining. Wherever European Vagrants go this season, expect it to be a wild ride, as the EIRL President can't even guarantee playoffs for his side - if Vagrants do not make the playoffs, the after-the-split schedule will tell the tale as to why.

Dave Wilson: Category III - IV - The top Category IV side (or the bottom Category III side), Gibralter really has a decent chance to make the playoffs - just several other sides ahead of them have slightly better chances. Rockies have just over £185,000 in free cap space available, so help could be on its way. But, we'll see.

Dave Paddock: Category III - Just slightly behind the other clearly defined Category III side, HK Redskins (HK could mean "Hell's Kitchen", but it doesn't) are not in too bad of shape - and with just over £120,000 in free cap space available, Padds can do some renovation, should he deem it necessary. If Redskins are in the lower group after the schedule split, I would like their playoff chances - but if they are in the top group in sixth or seventh spot, they might not be so happy...

Patrick: Category II - If there aren't any major injuries in the Cote d'Azur, Martinis' Top 17 factor is third best in EIRL. But, their Full Team factor is seventh best. The EIRL VP and Finance premo has £64,500 in free cap space to work with - enough for a moderate night at the gaming tables and a dinner for four at a Gordon Ramsay restaurant, to be sure, but maybe not for major improvements. No physio for Patrick, please - either shaken or stirred.

Rob: Category IV - With £237,500 in free cap space, Bulls have the ability to make some improvements. With their Full Team factor rating dead last, and their Top 17 factor rating 12th, Rob had better have a pair of aces up his sleeve if he can't improve the Burgas-based outfit. But, if the odds of Northern making the playoffs exceeds 15-1, put a fiver on them - I would.

Theo: Category III - Just slightly ahead of the other clearly defined Category III side, Rotterdam Rhinos are not in too bad of shape - and with just over £140,000 in free cap space available, the EIRL Gaming Officer can do some renovation, should he deem it necessary. If Rhinos are in the lower group after the schedule split, I would like their playoff chances - but if they are in the top group in sixth or seventh spot, they might not be so happy...

Jerome: Category I - Slightly vulnerable if there aren't major injuries throughout the EIRL, as their Full Team factor is somewhat better than their Top 17 factor, Beavers are a team that should make the playoffs no matter what happens. Saint-Maur had better like their side - with their salary cap the way that it is, only lateral moves are possible for the French outfit.

Neil: Category I - Nomads, like Martinis, are praying that their physio stays in the stands this season, as they are quite superior in their Top 17 factor rating. But their Full Team factor rating says that Tel-Aviv had better make the playoffs anyway. I see Grand Final in their future, if all goes well.

Daniel: Category IV - The Terriers need to be a terror in the player pool swaps, as their side (12th in Full Team factor, 13th in Top 17 factor), need some help - and have £170,500 to make something happen. It wouldn't surprise me if the Yorkshire side made the playoffs - but it wouldn't surprise me if they didn't, either.

Brent: Category I - If there is a preseason favourite to win the Grand Final, it would be Badgers. But, last season, the West Midlands outfit would have been relegated from the Premiership; the season before, they won the Premiership Grand Final. I don't know which side was the real Wolverhampton Badgers - and I'm sure Brent didn't know, either. But, aside from lateral moves, Badgers have the side that they're going to play with this season - are they ready to be the favourites?

Steve: Category II - Buffaloes run in herds, the whole herd winning battles against lions, leopards, Nomads, Beavers, and Badgers. Zagreb, like that herd on the savannahs, is slightly vulnerable in their Top 17 factor rating, but very solid in their Full Team factor rating. Playoffs? Sure, unless no one in EIRL suffers major injuries - and even if good health is the watchword for 2009, Zagreb should make the playoffs anyway.

EIRL Telegraph Blog Is Money in Your Bank...

EIRL Gaming Officer Theo Kamis has fined himself an undetermined amount (the amount being foregone income equivalent to the amount he would have earned for the EIRL Telegraph blog articles published by him from 15 December 2008 through midnight CDT 20 March 2009, which would have totalled at least several hundred thousand million pounds (see 1, below )) for an inadvertent violation of EIRL President Kevin Brock's request to keep friendlies arrangements off the group (see 2, below ).

For the record, there were four articles published by Theo during this period, besides this one: 507 words, 297 words, 698 words, and 654 words - managers who produce articles in this quantity will certainly cop lots of ££££'s (okay, a few thousand bob) - but a few thousands here, a few thousands there, can add up to something you need that's paid for, freeing up brass for other things that you thought you wouldn't be able to afford.

In addition, it helps entertain everyone in EIRL - and articles become easier to write when there are a lot of them to respond to and riff on, leading to more money, more participation, and more fun for all.

And, there's a selfish reason why I am asking for more articles - let's just say that I need all the good news and mental therapy that I can get right now, and my participation in a very active EIRL helps me far more than anyone (except probably Kevin) could possibly know.

I'm not asking for War and Peace every day - a "hello - and my side is going to kick your side's (or someone else's) arses on Saturday", from your own unique perspectives, in your own unique voices (which I do enjoy very much, by the way) would do nicely.

Thanks!

Disclaimer: There's no way I would have been paid for those previous articles. The purposes of this article are:

1) to encourage articles to be published to the EIRL Telegraph blog, by dramatizing the huge sums of money you can get for publishing there.
2) to apologise to the group for my inadvertent error in replying to group when asked not to by the EIRL President..

Secret Project Not Entirely Successful in Rotterdam

The secret project from de Kuip didn't get the Rhinos exactly what they wanted, except a hangover, a discovered tunnel, and eight pretty good players - just not the meter tall talking Buzz Lightyear action doll that they wanted, but a Mr Microphone, a Wheezy the Penguin, and an used original Dragnet board game.

Yes, Michael Dobson and Danny Brough are that good - and Rhinos' boss Theo Kamis was not happy to miss out on them, even though he predicted they would likely go 1 and 2..

Still, the Rhinos were in the sixth slot, and although they didn't get either of their top two picks as their draft board showed, they got their eight picks within their top 20 slots there: 3rd, 6th, 8th, 11th, 12th, 14th, 17th, and 20th.

Brief introductions and Theo's comments:

First round: Loose forward Rob Purdham: "He fills a need at the thirteen, is very good at attack and defence, and will be a very steadying force in the dressing room. Not a bad first pick..."

Second round: Centre Steven Bell: "I expect a lot from him this season, as he is a major upgrade to the backline, and a relief for the forwards like Danny (Sculthorpe) and Michael (Korkidas), who can play prop for a change, instead of Swiss Army knife..."

Third round: Stand off Danny McGuire: "Danny allows us lots of flexibility at the stand-off position - we can get him and Jamie (Rooney) on the pitch at the same time if either Rob (Purdham or Paul) gets a hard knock, or we have to slide Paul over to hooker. That's a necessity at top level rugby league..."

Fourth round: Second rower Richard Whiting: "Improvement at physical depth, improvement at team forward depth, improvement in mental depth, improvement in the community - Richard will bring that to Rhinos, hopefully for many years to come..."

Fifth round: Hooker Rangi Chase: "Ben Kaye is a nice young hooker, but we had a huge opportunity to upgrade at nine with Chase, and you can't have too many good players..."

Sixth round: Winger Cameron Phelps: "No wacky weed for him, like his namesake from the US Olympic swimming team - just solid and steady play, and another upgrade for the backline..."

Seventh round: Second rower Matt Cook: "I like Matt - even though he likes Bradford. When he came in to our green room, and saw we were watching "Hairspray", he started singing along with Queen Latifah. Anyone who does that is okay by me..."

Eighth round: Second rower Steve Snitch: "...and when Steve came in, he grabbed Matt, and did some dance with him - I think it was the quick step, but I'll let Bruno (Tonioli) tell us later. Actually, both Matt and Steve will improve things for us at the forwards, and they will definitely get some starts..."

Well, there are 66 Sainsbury's Meat Market slots available, and Rhinos need only fill four of them. Their first pick will likely be eighth - what player will they pray for?


- s

An EIRL-Related Secret Project Currently Underway In Holland: Retained Players Helping Out

Under the light of fat lamps at day and electric lamps by night, fortified by raisin hooch and escape fudge, secured by several gangs of stooges, and to musical accompaniment of Elmer Bernstein, the Rotterdam Rhinos coaching staff huddle over laptops with dial-up modems, doing...

...what?

What, exactly, are they doing? And why all the secrecy?

And what is up with the goon towers and searchlights, and the hundfuhrer and his German shepherds roaming about de Kuip, anyway?

And why is Dean McGilvrey hoarding tonnes of potatoes, whilst Robbie Paul is hoarding the raisins throughout southern Holland?

We're sorry - we can't tell you right now - we would be sent to the cooler for a month if we talked.

We can tell you two things about it, though:

1. It's not so unique that someone else's coaching staff couldn't do it - for all we know, it's already been done elsewhere.
2. It aims to give Rhinos a slight competitive advantage in the EIRL.

Right, we've talked too much already, since we've named two of the fifteen players Rotterdam Rhinos have retained for EIRL 2009. The complete list:

SCOTT GRIX

DIMITRI PELO

DEAN MCGILVREY

CARL FORBER

KRIS WELHAM

LUKE GEORGE

JASON WALTON

JAMIE ROONEY

ROBBIE PAUL

KYLE WOOD

MICHAEL KORKIDAS

DANNY SCULTHORPE

BEN KAYE

MICHAEL WORRINCY

JASON NETHERTON

The only real surprise was Carl Forber's retention, considering that Rhinos had him ranked 16th internally on their retention list.

But, with Jamie Rooney's goalkicking ratings being eviscerated due to the fact that John Kear had to fulfill a Scottish player quota, put in by the Prime Minister last season, in the fantasy league known as Super League, Rhinos coach Theo Kamis had little choice...

...right, the penguins are on shift now - we have to go now...

Retention Complete

First, let me say thank you to all teams for doing a great job with submitting the retention lists. It made my job very easy.

Sadly, Antonio/CAU Madrid did not submit a player list. I have worked with Kevin to retain players for Antonio/CAU. I think we did what a "reasonable" coach would have done, in case Antonio surfaces with a good (cough, cough) excuse, or in the unfortunate situation a caretaker/replacement coach must be found.

Since retention is done a little earlier than expected, I would ask all coaches review their requests vs. the players I have retained. Just to make sure I did not make an error. If so, you must notify me ASAP. The deadline for notfiying me of an error will be 23:59 GMT on Sunday March 8. I will notify the group if any changes are made to the player database.

Attached is the player database after retention (this is in the "files" section of the e-group). I have added an additional column called EIRL TEAM. This column will list a team name if the player has been retained by a team, "Player Pool" if the player is available to be drafted, or "No Draft" which identifies a player who has not been offically rated, eventhough they have a 1/1 rating.

Starting at 23:59 on Sunday March 8 teams can start sending me their draft instructions. I will not outline a specific way that the instructions must be given as teams will have different needs, but here are a couple of possible examples.

A) (The easiest) One big list of players in order of preference. I will move down the list from round to round selecting the next available player.

B) (target a different position by round) Here your list your players in order of preference, by position. And tell me, in round 1 select the next available player from the winger list, for example. In round 2, select the next available player from the prop list, etc.

c) (tier desired players with no preference of position) Here you tier players into sub groups based upon salary or just your preference. You then instruct me to pick the next available player from group A each time it is your turn, until all players from group A are gone. I then would be instructed to start selecting players from group B, etc.

As you can see there are lots of options.

What I ask of everyone is to submit their draft lists ASAP. This will give me an opportunity to review your instructions and resolve any questions I have. This will not be available to teams who send in their lists at the last minute.

* When making your lists please include ID# and player name
* The deadline for draft lists in 23:59 GMT on Friday March 13
* Do not attempt to select "No Draft" / 11,000 salary / 1/1 rated players
* Watch your salary cap levels. Each team gets 2 million, no excuse for going over.

Here is the draft order with salary cap space used and left:

Rank	Club	Players	Remain	Spent	Left
1	Dublin Dynamo	13	14	753,500	1,246,500
2	West Yorkshire Terriers	13	14	784,000	1,216,000
3	Northern Bulls of Burgas	15	12	885,500	1,114,500
4	CAU Madrid Rugby XIII	13	14	910,000	1,090,000
5	Gibralter Rockies	15	12	918,500	1,081,500
6	Rotterdam Rhinos	15	12	935,000	1,065,000
7	Wolverhampton Badgers	12	15	948,500	1,051,500
8	European Vagrants	13	14	972,500	1,027,500
9	Hull Kingston Redskins	15	12	976,000	1,024,000
10	Cumberland Falcons	15	12	1,061,500	938,500
11	Saint-Maur Beavers	14	13	1,084,000	916,000
12	Zagreb Buffaloes	15	12	1,123,500	876,500
13	Monte-Carlo Martinis	15	12	1,138,000	862,000
14	Tel-Aviv Nomads	17	10	1,253,500	746,500

Please let Patrick know if you have any questions.

Ellery Hanley Trophy Draw

EHT First Round (games played over two legs, first leg as stated below)

Byes: Rotterdam Rhinos, Hull Kingston Redskins

Saint-Maur Beavers v West Yorkshire Terriers

Tel-Aviv Nomads v European Vagrants

Zagreb Buffaloes v Northern Bulls of Burgas

Dublin Dynamo v CAU Madrid Rugby XIII

Gibralter Rockies v Wolverhampton Badgers

Monte-Carlo Martinis v Cumberland Falcons

EHT Quarter Finals (games played over two legs, first leg as stated below)

(QF1) Tel-Aviv Nomads or European Vagrants v Gibralter Rockies or Wolverhampton Badgers

(QF2) Rotterdam Rhinos v Saint-Maur Beavers or West Yorkshire Terriers

(QF3) Monte-Carlo Martinis or Cumberland Falcons v Zagreb Buffaloes or Northern Bulls of Burgas

(QF4) Dublin Dynamo or CAU Madrid Rugby XIII v Hull Kingston Redskins

EHT Semi Finals (games to be played over one leg, neutral venue)

(SF1) Winner QF1 v Winner QF2

(SF2) Winner QF3 v Winner QF4

EHT Final (to be played over one leg, neutral venue - both finalists receive bye in Trevor Foster Cup First Round)

Winner SF1 v Winner SF2

All dates will be confirmed once the player draft and selection processes have been confirmed.

Retention Tension, Where's My Pension?

It may be much harder for the old Division One sides to compete well this season, I believe, than would be expected. After all, the salary cap increase, to £2 million per team, only increased the old Prem sides by £200,000, while increasing the cap for the old Division One sides by £600,000. And there are six fewer sides than before. So why am I nervous?

You mean, besides the fact that I have one fewer home game than away game this season? (I'm not alone in having one fewer home game, of course - but anyone who says that they prefer playing away from home must have a bad home life, or hyper-unrealistic fans to contend with.) Well, as the old Dales farmers always say, "...these things happen..."

Actually, the answer is far simpler than this - and I saw it when I was analyzing my retention at de Kuip today. Rotterdam Rhinos have a maximum of 15 slots for retention available: 12 regular, plus 3 - £44k rule slots. So when I picked all the top salaried players I had, plus my best three £44k rule players, their total cap figure was £935,000.

"What's wrong with that?", you say, "you have over a million quid for 12 players!"

Well, there is.

First - the average salary cap figure for each of my needed 12 players, in order to reach £2 million, is £88,750.

Second - since salary is tied to performance (ratings) far more closely than in the real world (ask Warrington Wolves), any unused salary cap is team power that is lost - until you can utilise it all, you have less power than your opponents.

Third - there are a total of 337 players in the database that have salary figures of £60k or more - the average salary of these players is £76,300. And a lot of these players will be retained, and not be made available for the draft or meat market - I have 11 of these.

So, the odds of Rhinos, or any other old Division One side, actually using all of its £2 million salary cap, is rather low. Actual odds will depend on everyone else's retention strategies, of course.

So, if you're running one of the old Division One sides, you had better:

1. Expect a bit of a difficult season this year, until things shake out next season (these things always get fixed - remember that). Then again, if you wanted boring, you could watch Prime Minister's Questions or Pop/American Idol.
   
2. Plan on winning as many of the last six games as you can, and as many games against the old Division One sides as you can - one playoff side, at least, will come from the bottom seven, created after the SPL-style split after 13 games. This split will be even more important for the lower end of the table than the top of the table.
3. Come up with something completely different that the top sides don't have to do, for a comparative advantage of some sort.
4. Constantly work to improve your tactics in team orders and lineups - David can't beat Goliath if no one gets him the stone for his slingshot on time.
   
5. If you can participate in the EIRL Telegraph, you will get cash, to better improve your team - and good-natured cantankerous griping, in moderation, is always good reading for everyone else (as well as a distraction, so you can take better advantage of 3 and 4, above - who says Sun Tzu isn't worth reading?), as well as acting as a bit of catharsis for you, the writer.
6. Use your training points very wisely.
7. If you need help, or clarification of any rule, ask! No fines will be issued for asking - but fines and penalties can result from NOT asking (if you make a mistake, the rules about penalties are very strict - particularly about salary cap issues).

My retention decisions have been sent in - may God have mercy on me.

And by the way- bonus points for anyone who can tell me the hidden reference that this article title is referencing :)

New Gaming Officer

In just two dayz, EIRL Prezident Kevin Brock has hotfooted hiz way between the USA and Wigan to finalize the deal that zaw Patrick Cunningham confirmed as the new EIRL Vice Prezident effective yezterday and now by the appointment of Theo Kamiz as Gaming Officer.

The decizion to appoint Kamiz may come as a zhock to zome, including former Gaming Officer Neil Croad however almozt two weekz of zilence from Croad haz zeen Brock forced into making a decision to enzure the zmooth onzet of the new zeazon which alzo underwent a re-ztructuring during the courze of the day due to the withdrawal of two teamz.

Brock commented that he had every confidence in hiz new backroom line-up of Cunningham and Kamiz "ztate-zide" az EIRL continuez it'z global appeal and hopez that other team memberz will give both their full zupport before heading off to the duty free where he was believed to be dizcussing new tranzatlantic tax incentivez for EIRL clubz with Britizh Idiot Gordon Brown and new kid on the block Barrack Obama.

Az a gezture of goodwill to our American counterpartz, the letter "s" has been made redundant within the EIRL officez and replaced wholly with "z" to enzure they feel more comfortable, although he did ztate that EIRL financez would continue to be in whole poundz and not the untruztworthy dollar.

Competition Changes

Due to Vienna Mustangs being uncoached (although a caretaker was appointed) and Roland Lucas failing to confirm his intention to participate in EIRL 2009 both sides have been removed from the competition with immediate effect.

The 2009 Season will now run in ONE conference consisting of all 14 teams, with the regular season split into two phases.

In phase one, each team will play each other once. The fixtures for these are on the website.

At the conclusion of the first 13 games, the league will be split into two. The top 7 sides will play each other as will the bottom 7 sides (a further 6 games each). Points gained in phase one will carry forward to phase two.

The Ellery Hanley Trophy and Trevor Foster Cup will now be re-formatted to straight knockout competitions as follows:

First Round - 12 teams (6 ties) with two byes awarded at random to be played over two legs

Quarter Finals - 6 R1 winners + 2 byes to be played over two legs

Semi Finals - 4 QF winners over one leg at a neutral venue

Final - 2 SF winners over one leg at a neutral venue

The finalists of the Ellery Hanley Trophy will be the two teams receiving a bye in the Trevor Foster Cup.

The EHT and TFC draws will be announced at a later date. Teams not playing (either with a bye or knocked out) in the EHT will be able to arrange further trial games if they wish.

The Phase One fixtures are available on the EIRL website. Information on the website will be updated over the next day or so:

Retention and Draft Information

Thus far only 3 teams have submitted their retention requests:

• Hull Kingston
• Monte Carlo
• Zagreb

The deadline is 23:59 GMT Friday March 6

Draft Instructions:

1) The deadline for submitting draft instructions will be 23:59 GMT on Friday March 13

2) The draft will consist of 8 rounds

3) The draft order will be determined by the amount of salary cap space remaining after player retention. The team with the most salary cap space after retention will have the first pick in each of the 8 rounds. The team with the least salary cap space remaining after player retention will have the last pick in each round.

4) Teams should provide a list of players to select for each round of the draft. When it is your team's turn to pick, I will proceed down your list of players until I reach the first available player. Teams may also submit conditional instructions. Teams should submit clear instructions as to how you wish me to proceed in a given situation. If it is not clear, don't blame me if you don't get who/what you want.

I will post an updated player database after retention has been processed. Expected date is Sunday March 8.
At that time I will also post the draft order, based upon salary cap space remaining.
I expect to publish the result of the draft on Sunday March 15.

The Meat Market phase will then begin. I expect to handle this in the exact same way as the Player Draft. The team with the most salary cap space after retention & draft will have the pick first each round of the meat market. The team with the least salary cap space remaining after player retention & draft will have the last pick in each round of the meat market. This will continue until each team has 27 players. So, based upon player retention and draft, each team will participate in the meat market/be required to submit player selection instructions for a different number of rounds

The expected deadline for submitting meat market instructions will be 23:59 GMT on Friday March 20.
I expect to publish results of the meat market on Sunday March 22.

Starting on Tuesday March 24 at 00:01 GMT, and ending on Thursday 26 at 23:59 GMT players may make free player pool swaps. These will be processed on a first come, first served basis. I will communicate player pool swaps to the group as they are processed.

The final player database will be presented to Kevin on Friday March 27.

Please let me know if you have any questions.

Retention Information

Retention rules & guidelines:

Team player retention limits are in message #15778
http://sports.groups.yahoo.com/group/eirl/message/15778

I would like to receive all teams retention requests by 2359hrs GMT on Friday 6 March 2009. This will allow me to process over the weekend, and publish the results by Sunday March 8. I will try to publish a list of teams who have not sent in their retention on Wednesday or Thursday. I will email back each team confirming receipt of your retention requests. I will NOT publish the details of any teams specific retention requests, until the league wide results are released next Sunday.

All retention requests should sent to me directly at [omitted]. I will be sending a copy of my retention requests to Kevin tonight to avoid any potential conflicts.

Retention request format:

1) Should be typed into a body of an email with a subject line similar to "EIRL Retention - Your Team Name". Attaching your player list in a text file, excel file, or word document are also acceptable.
2) list each player by ID, Name, and an indication if this player is a 2008 44,000 player retention. For example:

1001 Aaron Groom Under 44K
1002 Aaron Muphy

** Players with salaries of 11K can NOT be drafted or retained (but, there should not be any retainable 11K players). During the ratings process we rated any new, unknown/little known player at 1/1, 11,000 This allows us to keep the player in the database for future rating, most likely for 2010 season.
** Anyone attempting to retain a player who was not on their 2008 roster will forfit that retention spot
** Anyone attempting to retain a player as a 44K spot, who was over 44K in 2008 will forfit that retention spot

If you are not able to meet the retention deadline for a valid reason, please let me know ASAP. I will make every consideration reasonably possible.

Future Dates (all times for deadlines are 2359hrs on the date set):
Friday March 6 retention due
Sunday March 8 retention published
Friday March 13 Primary Draft via email, probably 8 rounds
Sunday March 15 Primary Draft results published
Friday March 19* Meat Market via email, to fill out rest of 27 player roster spots
Sunday March 21 Meat Market results published
Starting Monday March 22 thru Friday March 27, free Player Pool swaps can be made on a first in, first processed basis
Saturday March 28 rosters finalized

* This date should read Friday March 20.

Please familiarise yourself with the retention and draft rules available on the EIRL website (http://eirl.playiirl.com).

New EIRL Vice President announced

After careful consideration, I have taken the decision to appoint Patrick Cunningham as the Vice President of EIRL, a position he has accepted.

This decision is taken to ensure that someone who is actively involved in the competition assumes the role and although Rob Gwatkin has had many years of loyal service to EIRL, the fact I have been unable to contact him to discuss this change with him (as a matter of courtesy) only strengthens the decision.

I would like to place on record my sincere gratitude to Rob for his support since I initially took over the reins of EIRL, and since I returned as President. I hope that I will never again have to sleep on his bathroom floor however, or treat him to such an unsightly scene again!

The decision to ask Patrick to take on the role was made after a lot of consideration, and there were many names who I was tempted to consider. However, Patrick's unerring support during the most recent weeks, a time of great difficulty for myself, and his excellent work on the ratings did, I have to admit, swing this decision. Added to this Patrick's previous role as Finance Commissioner means he has a detailed insight into the workings of the competition.

Being VP is not just a figurehead role. If I make bad decisions, then there is a check and balance mechanism there. If I make a ruling which is objected to, then Patrick will hear that appeal and make his own judgement on the initial decision.

I have every confidence that Patrick is a valuable asset and I am happy to have him by my side

2009 Ratings Released!

The 2009 Player Ratings have now been finalised and released. This is the FINAL version and NO amendments will be made to it. All teams had the opportunity to participate in the ratings process, and very few did.

May I place on record the most sincere gratitude to Patrick Cunningham who has worked tirelessly on producing these ratings, I know he put a lot of work into this and any ratings determined have followed a logical process based on previous performance. I'm sure Patrick will post at some time with how certain aspects of the ratings were assessed.

May I also thank Daniel Brew for his initial work in compiling squad lists from NL1 which was much appreciated.

Details on the retention/draft and meat market processes, which will be handled by Patrick will be made in the coming days, including any deadlines which will need to be adhered to. Of course, please bear my earlier post in mind in relation to form guides, although if you do have your 2008 form guide that will of course assist.

The purpose of this e-mail being issued now gives you an opportunity, if you have your form guide, to take an initial look at who you might and might not retain for the 2009 season (check the Blog article from the other week for how many players you may retain if you have forgotten).

As soon as we have a definite timeframe for retention, including relevant deadlines you will be advised. The ratings file has also been uploaded to the Yahoo! Group and can be accessed here.

Latest Information

The player ratings, thanks to an incredible effort by Patrick Cunningham, have now been finalised and will be released as soon as possible in order that retention and draft processes can begin.

I am hoping that Neil will be able to provide the form guides for all clubs from last season - however - if you already have your clubs, please let me know (send me the copy please).

I am still waiting to hear from Neil if he has, so far, managed to get the sim up and running and will let teams know where we stand on that as soon as possible.

Finally, vacant clubs. Vienna Mustangs are no longer with us as detailed previously, and I have so far had no response from Roland Lucas at Duesseldorf. He has now been given until 6pm Tuesday to confirm otherwise his team will be removed. If this is the case, both Vienna and Duesseldorf will not line up for 2009 and the competition structure will be re-formatted to ONE conference (more on that as details are confirmed).

As soon as I have any more news, you will, of course, be the first to know.

Also, watch out for a major announcement to take place tomorrow - pending further enquiries.

Vienna Mustangs

Dave Wilson has been appointed as caretaker-coach of Vienna Mustangs until a permanent successor can be found.

Retention Update

We are close to confirming the arrangements for retention, player drafts, meat market and final squad changes for the 2009 season and hope to be able to provide more information on this in the coming days.

Below is a list of how many players all teams are eligible to retain:

14 PLAYERS (plus 3 players rated at £44,000 or less in 2008)
Zagreb Buffaloes
Dublin Dynamo
Hull Kingston Redskins
Tel-Aviv Nomads

12 PLAYERS (plus 3 players rated at £44,000 or less in 2008)
Vienna Mustangs*
Gibralter Rockies
Northern Bulls of Burgas
Monte-Carlo Martinis
Saint-Maur Beavers
Cumberland Falcons
Rotterdam Rhinos

10 PLAYERS (plus 3 players rated at £44,000 or less in 2008)
European Vagrants
Wolverhampton Badgers
West Yorkshire Terriers
CAU Madrid Rugby XIII

0 PLAYERS (NEW TEAM)
Duesseldorf Rhinelanders

I hope to be able to access form guides for all teams shortly, and these can then be sent to you if required.

* Please note, Vienna Mustangs are currently uncoached. If a CONFERENCE B coach is interested in caretaking the team until a replacement can be sought, to include retention and drafting, please contact me privately.

Further Update

Further to my message of earlier in the week, some very extensive work is currently being undertaken led by Patrick Cunningham for which I think we should all be extremely grateful.

As soon as any further information is available you will of course be notified.

Important Update

This is an update to bring you fully up to speed on how things stand at the present time and to seek potential resolution where necessary.

ME

I'm going to start with me. This way, anything further will probably make a little more sense. Last week I was signed off from work for a period of time due to stress. A lot of this is work related, some is personal and some is directly linked to EIRL, including the ratings process. The resignation of a key ally by text did not help my mood much I have to admit and I was on the verge of leaving myself (again). I've deliberately taken some time out so as not to make a knee jerk reaction and I am committed to EIRL as much as I can be at the present time. Unfortunately though I realise it is time to put myself first and stop worrying about others quite so much. I hope you will understand.

RATINGS

Initially I had a pool of four people willing to assist in the ratings process for 2009, including myself. Sadly, only Daniel was able to commit to providing information necessary to assist in this. This is not critical of Matt, who later resigned from the competition, or Clint. I am fully aware we all have busy lives and we all have more important things to worry about in the current climate than subjectively rating however many players for a fantasy competition.

I now do not feel that the ratings process is going anywhere fast. I certainly don't have the experience or knowledge to accurately rate all the players or for this process to happen quickly. Ratings were due to be released last week, I envisage even if I did try to rate them, we could be looking at a further 6-8 week process, perhaps longer. Added to this, the database of players is incomplete and potentially inaccurate which further complicates matters.

What I propose may not be popular, but it is what I am about to offer.

I propose for the 2009 season to use the 2008 ratings and database. In full. During the course of the 2009 season, the ratings process will start taking shape for 2010, based on subjective performances throughout the season. Hopefully by the end of the 2009 season, we will have already formulated much of the information necessary for 2010 and will only then have to add new players (if they get granted a visa!) and rate these as accurately as possible.

It is by far an ideal situation, but it is a way forward to circumvents any further substantial delay. It puts EIRL 2009 back on track and gives a clear and concise way forward. Unless there is an outpouring of disgust at the suggestion, this is what will happen, therefore what follows is based on this proposal moving forward (the alternative is a lengthy delay of at least 10-14 weeks - allowing for finalisation of player capture then a minimum 6-8 weeks for rating).

RETENTION/PLAYER DRAFT

Existing retention rules will remain in place. For the teams moving from Division One to the new Premiership structure, there will still be a degree of players who you will be able to sign in order to strengthen your squad. You may still be weaker than most of the established Premiership squads but this then presents a challenge for you to break any previous former monopoly. Bear in mind also there is no relegation, and you would still have been in the same position anyway with regards signing players whether a full re-rating took place or otherwise.

I am going to give any substantial objectors to the ratings proposal till this weekend to speak up, but assuming this goes ahead, I will publish retention and draft timetables next week.

Patrick Cunningham has stated that he is able to assist with the draft process and I will be consulting further with him in relation to this, including his potential availability in order that a timetable can be established.

PRE-SEASON CUP

It is possible the competition may be re-formatted dependent on future timescales, although at present it remains in the format as drawn.

SIM

Neil Croad is back on board and in a position to resume Gaming Officer duties. I am confident that the circumstances which took place at the end of 2008 were highly exceptional and I would certainly not envisage a repeat of this (would we Neil)!

At present however, Neil is having some problems getting the sim to run on Vista. Work is currently taking place to hopefully remedy this. If this is not possible, then I am not sure what the solution might be although I have had one offer of help in relation to this area from when Neil was unavailable.

As I state above, the way forward is not a great one, but, it is what I have to offer you without putting myself under further undue pressure at this difficult time. It gives a clear way ahead for the 2009 season, it begins the process for 2010 earlier than ever seen before, it streamlines processes, and ensures the spirit of the competition lives on and I commend it to the house [and we are still months off the Budget]!

Vienna Mustangs and Ratings

Matt Danby has today announced his resignation as coach of Vienna Mustangs. I would like to take this opportunity to thank Matt for his many loyal years of service to EIRL and hope the time pressures he is under relent to allow him to re-join in the future.

With regards to the ratings, progress in this area is very unclear. Of four raters, Daniel, Clint, Matt and myself, only two have contributed to this process and now with Matt gone, with his considerable experience in this area, it is unclear how this will progress further.

I am investigating a number of options in relation to this and will provide details as soon as possible, but in the meantime, the date for the publication of ratings will not be met (the target date was next weekend) and as such this will further impact on the start of the 2009 season.

Additionally, although Neil has returned and is in a position and willing to continue as Gaming Officer, there are some technical issues in getting him set up with a working copy of the sim which will further impact progress in this area. As soon as the above issues are resolved, further information will be provided to clubs.

Ratings Update

The ratings process is currently continuing for the 2009 season and so far, 611 players from Super League and National League One have been identified.

Of these, 138 would need a rating to be assessed from scratch, whilst a further 115 may need a re-assessment of their rating as they are predicted to be playing at a higher level in 2009 than last season. There is no certainty that these will be changed, and each will be taken into consideration on an individual basis.

At present the ratings panel are sourcing additional information to complete the remainder of the database before any further action on specific ratings takes place.

Of course, as the situation develops, all teams will be duly notified, but may I thank you for your patience at the present time. The target date for the final publication of the ratings for 2009 is 13 February 2009, but this is dependent on a number of factors and can easily change.

Any coaches who would still be able to assist in the ratings process (there is a lot of work to do) are asked to contact Kevin Brock as soon as possible.

New Website Webathon

After eleven years of fantasy football, the International Interactive Rugby League needs to grow and to do that it needs to develop a brand new website like never seen before.

However, to design the website, this will cost time and money.

This is why we need your help to donate today to make the new IIRL website a reality.

Imagine being able to view player ratings, update your team info, contact other team coaches, post Telegraph articles, see other competitions and more all in one website?

These benefits will not only assist with the IIRL Premiership, but with the EIRL and other competitions as well.

Can it be done? Yes it can – but only with your help.

Please donate today.

Fixtures released

Slightly earlier than expected, helped by an array of offers on Christmas gifts at Asda today, the fixtures for the 2009 season have now been released and posted to the EIRL website.

Opening Day League Fixtures:
CAU Madrid Rugby XIII .v. Dublin Dynamo
Cumberland Falcons .v. European Vagrants
Duesseldorf Rhinelanders .v. Hull Kingston Redskins
Monte-Carlo Martinis .v. Vienna Mustangs
Northern Bulls of Burgas .v. Rotterdam Rhinos
Saint-Maur Beavers .v. Tel-Aviv Nomads
West Yorkshire Terriers .v. Zagreb Buffaloes
Wolverhampton Badgers .v. Gibralter Rockies

In addition, the fixtures for the group stages of both the Ellery Hanley Trophy and Trevor Foster Cup have been released.

Play-Off format confirmed, fixtures due for release...

With a compelling argument in favour of the McIntrye Final Eight system to be used for the 2009 season, EIRL President Kevin Brock has now closed the voting on this issue and this will be implemented.

The new Super League proposals which were also considered, unsurprisingly found no favour, with Brock's own simplified version polling just a couple of votes.

With that issue resolved, and the ratings process still ongoing, Brock has had the opportunity to fire up the number cruncher yet again and can confirm that the 2009 fixtures for the EIRL Premiership, Ellery Hanley Trophy and Trevor Foster Cup will be released at 1100GMT Friday on the EIRL website. This will be a significant moment as teams will find out who they will be paired against in the first season of single division competition, spread over two conferences. Although Brock knows who will be up against who, he was sworn to secrecy and divulged absolutely nothing. We can tell he's becoming a Wiganer!

Rotterdam Rhinos' Christmas party insane...

special to the EIRL Telegraph
by Ashleigh Elson - Curious Orange
Radio Netherlands Worldwide

I emigrated to the Netherlands from Toronto a few years ago - and I got used to being able to wear nice skirts all year round if I felt like it. But, I asked myself this morning, "What the *@#$ am I doing here?!" In Rotterdam this morning, it was about zero, with a projected high of 4 - but here, it's minus 27, with a high projected to be minus 19...

...and yet, I discovered I could wear a nice dress - with thick woolen leggings, of course. But, going down to the hotel restaurant, the question still remained, "What the *@#$ am I doing here?!"

And where was here? And what was I doing here?

"Good morning," a man called from behind me. I turned around to see a relatively short man, instantly recognisable by the fact that he was in shirtsleeves, instead of a heavy winter coat, and was clearly enjoying himself, despite the fact that he had to take his glasses off to see me, they were fogged so.

So I was being treated to the cook's tour of Minneapolis in December, perhaps the only month that Rotterdam Rhinos' manager Theo Kamis gets to spend at home. But, even then, he was still not entirely relaxed - even on his birthday.

So I asked him what I was doing here. "It looks like you're here to see one of our year-in-review meetings," he replied, "and you probably want to get some inside information about our preparations for next season, also..."

Whilst the waiter brought fresh Racine raspberry kringle and coffee (for me) and chai (for Theo), he told me about some of what he normally did during the closed sessions, and handed me a portable DVD player. "This is a league primer, with the good, the bad, and the ugly - and why each was classed as they were," he told me. "And all of the situations on the DVD were from Rhinos' past season."

As we ate, I asked him to tell me one secret from the closed sessions. What he said surprised me, until he explained. "I told all the players that none were guaranteed a place at Rhinos for next season, not even Jamie Rooney...."

My jaw dropped in disbelief - if there was one area in which Theo had a reputation for being conservative, it was in being loyal to players that had contributed over the years that would still be able to contribute. And Jamie had been Theo's talisman throughout his entire coaching career.

But, as Theo explained, showing me the EIRL rules documents for 2009, the salary cap increase for all clubs to £2 million, plus the reduction of the number of clubs from 24, spanning two divisions, three seasons ago, to 16, in one division split into two conferences, for the upcoming season, left many questions that would not be answered until the player ratings were released.

"Even top clubs like Mustangs and Vagrants will have to trim their sails carefully - and how this will affect the old Division One clubs is anyone's guess, what with them having an extra £600k to spend," Theo said, "but how much will their existing players cost, and how will they be rated, will have a far greater impact on retention decisions than ever."

He handed me an envelope as he got up to leave - inside was directions to their Christmas party at Mancini's Char House in Saint Paul. "Drinks are on your own - but dinner, entertainment, and a free taxi ride to the hotel is included," he told me. "And you should see what Jamie can do with wine glasses..."

With two hours to go until the open session began, I hit the play button on the DVD player, and ordered a refill of my coffee, and more kringle....

Rockies re-join for 2009

Gibralter Rockies are the 16th and final team confirmed for 2009 and will have retention rights. The reason for the lack of a response by the deadline is I was still sending all e-mails to his former employer works address and as such Dave never saw them. As this is my fault, he will be able to continue in 2009.

Ratings Process starts

The ratings process for the 2009 season is now well and truly underway and a team of four (Kevin Brock, Matt Danby, Clint Rylance and Daniel Brew) are all actively working towards this process.

From the initial player capture exercise, which is, as yet, not completed, 391 players were identified from Super League including 79 players who were not previously rated. A start has also been made on the NL1 list.

With a minimum of 432 players required, plus spares for the Player Pool this is a very encouraging start.

If any other coaches are able in any way to assist with the rating process, they are asked to contact Kevin Brock as soon as possible stating what they would be able to do or any particular area of expertise.

The intended deadline for the completion of the ratings process is 13 February 2009 and this allows time for retention and the player selection processes with the Pre-Season Cup tentatively pencilled in to start on 25 March. Key dates on the provisional schedule are below:

13 February - Player Ratings completed
20 February - Retention deadline
27 February - Player Draft deadline
6 March - Meat Market deadline
17-21 March - Friendlies
25 March - Start of Ellery Hanley Trophy
10-13 April - EHT Semi Finals and Final
19 April - League Round 1

2009 Update

The Retention and Draft, Trades, Training and Finance Rules for 2009 have now been confirmed and have been uploaded to the website.

Please ensure you are familiar with them before the start of next season as there have been major changes.

The Team Orders rules require some tweaking to make things a little simpler, and include additional information and these will follow shortly.

In addition, if you click on the Tables > Premiership link you will see that there are TWO conferences for the Premiership for 2009. I am hopeful that the 16th team will be taken before the start of the 2009 season, if not, it will be offered to a coach in an opposite conference to act as Caretaker-Coach.

The details of who is in what conference, fixtures etc. will be published sometime in the near future.

I will establish a poll soon regarding the play-off format you would like for the 2009 season. In the first two instances, these will involve 8 sides in the Finals Play-Off series and ranking will be determined by amalgamating the top four teams in each conference.

In the third option, this will involve the top four in each conference playing off, and the Conference Grand Final winners contesting the EIRL Grand Final.

The three options to consider are:
McIntyre Final Eight System - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/McIntyre_Final_Eight_System
The 2009 ESL Play Off System - http://www.superleague.co.uk/article.php?id=12449
The KB "Lets Make It Simple" System - erm, there isn't one!

The poll will close on New Years Eve.

With regards to the ratings, I hope to make an active start on this over the weekend, together with Matt, Daniel and Clint with the first stage being a compilation of players from Super League, NL1 and 2 and France. With 16 teams we will need a minimum of 432 players in the pool. Last year there were over 1,000 so it is quite possible that NL2 or France may be dropped (France is notoriously difficult to get the correct information for, however, where possible, French players ALREADY signed to teams we will try to re-rate so as not to cause any detriment). The hazard if NL2 is dropped is that there will be a reduction in the number of filler players, and this could affect teams in ensuring they remain within the salary cap. These are discussions that will be led further by the Ratings Panel so no further input is required at this time.

Tel Aviv Nomads

Information has just been passed to myself regarding Neil Croad.

Whilst I am not in a position to discuss this, it does mean that Neil has been unable to access e-mails lately but will be intending to continue in 2009.

Based on this, the Tel-Aviv franchise will be allowed to continue in 2009.

In relation to Neil's position as Gaming Officer this will be discussed in more detail at a more appropriate time.

2009 Update

The following teams have now been confirmed for the 2009 season:
CAU Madrid Rugby XIII (Antonio Alonso), Cumberland Falcons (Mark Wells), Dublin Dynamo (Clint Rylance), Duesseldorf Rhinelanders (Roland Lucas), European Vagrants (Kevin Brock), Hull Kingston Redskins (Dave Paddock), Monte-Carlo Martinis (Patrick Cunningham), Northern Bulls of Burgas (Rob Savage), Rotterdam Rhinos (Theo Kamis), Saint-Maur Beavers (Jerome Gilbon), Vienna Mustangs (Matt Danby), West Yorkshire Terriers (Daniel Brew), Wolverhampton Badgers (Brent Douglas), Zagreb Buffaloes (Steve Hudson).

Gibralter Monkies, Lietuva Animals, Lisbon Leopards, Oslo Icemen and Torino Titans, together with vacant teams Budapest Vikings and Tel-Aviv Nomads have been removed from the competition. These coaches have all been contacted privately thanking them for their participation and inviting them to re-join us again in the near future if they wish to do so.

The total number of teams is 14, and with this, I have taken the decision to move to a ONE DIVISION competition with effect from next season. Additionally, I am keeping TWO vacant team positions open, either for later sign ups, or if missing coaches do decide to return. They will be able to name these sides themselves, and select their entire squad. This will give us a 16 team competition from next year, the format for which is yet to be determined.

Attention now turns towards the player ratings process, which with limited numbers of willing volunteers will be a considerable challenge, however, please feel free to contact me personally if you do find yourself in a position to assist. Don't come blaming the raters if things don't go your way!

With regards to the consultation, this is now over and various adaptations based on the little feedback received will now be included where these are felt to be to the benefit of the competition. The rules will be posted to the website when these are finalised as there will be minor changes to be made, especially with a move to one division. Again, teams have had plentiful opportunity to respond, and if something is included which is not to your liking, well perhaps you should have spoken up sooner!

Duesseldorf Rhinelanders join EIRL community

Duesseldorf Rhinelanders, coached by Roland Lucas have today become the 14th team confirmed in EIRL for the 2009 season.

A warm welcome is extended to Roland.

Final Reminder

All teams are reminded that Sunday is the final day for teams who have not, as yet, confirmed they will be taking part in 2009 to do so. The deadline will not be extended further as teams have had plenty of opportunity to reply.

Thirteen teams have so far confirmed their participation:
CAU Madrid Rugby XIII (Antonio Alonso)
Cumberland Falcons (Mark Wells)
Dublin Dynamo (Clint Rylance)
European Vagrants (Kevin Brock)
Hull Kingston Redskins (Dave Paddock)
Monte-Carlo Martinis (Patrick Cunningham)
Northern Bulls of Burgas (Rob Savage)
Rotterdam Rhinos (Theo Kamis)
Saint-Maur Beavers (Jerome Gilbon)
Vienna Mustangs (Matt Danby)
West Yorkshire Terriers (Daniel Brew)
Wolverhampton Badgers (Brent Douglas)
Zagreb Buffaloes (Steve Hudson)

Additionally, Sunday will see the end of a one month consultation on proposed rule changes for 2009. So far there have been two responses.

Bulls to continue

After getting engaged in Paris, Northern Bulls of Burgas coach Rob Savage has been able to confirm that his side will be continuing their venture in 2009. The Bulls will be taking their place in the EIRL Premiership following reaching the Division One Grand Final, where they were beaten by Hull Kingston Redskins.

Congratulations are offered to Rob on his engagement.

2009 Website goes live

The 2009 website has now been uploaded to the playiirl servers this morning. It can be found at http://eirl.playiirl.com. The 2008 website can be archived (as can all sites from previous seasons) by adding /2008 (or whatever year you like) to the end.

What EIRL Managers Did On Their Summer Vacation

In elementary schools here in America, there used to be a time-honoured tradition: The first assignment always was to write a short essay, entitled, "What I Did on My Summer Vacation."

Well, I wonder what the EIRL managers who went to Australia this summer (in Australia, anyway - it's getting bloody frigid for us Northerners!) would write, if they had this assignment: "What I Did During My EIRL Vacation...

...yes, I can see it now...

...the managers that didn't go to Australia complain about having to go to Algeria ("The beautiful sandy beaches overlook the azure Mediterranean, and are just fifteen minutes away from your hotel..." "...by JET!?!"), Albania ("Win the last Yugo ever made, while eating your garlicked Spam Lamb with your ouzo..." (just about the only way one can eat garlicked Spam lamb is with ouzo, or straight grain alcohol)), or America ("...bloody hell! Lying politicians all over the telly, no rugby, and they have the wrong BBC programmes on the telly here ("Life on Mars", "Dancing With The Stars" ("Strictly" across the pond), "The Office" - instead of quality programmes like "As Time Goes By", "Waiting for God", "Dad's Army", and "Tenko") - I'm off to Algeria to eat couscous by hand instead, on the fifteen minute trip to the beach!")...

...and, as for the managers that did, well...there were only two managers out of the ten in the IIRL World Cup that didn't have current EIRL ties - and one of those was (genuflect when you hear his name!) Earthquake himself...

...and the other (Richard Rathbourne) took Fiji to the Grand Final.

The headmistress, Miss Wormwood, called the final eight in this order, and here's what her first two victims said:

Mark Wells (Cumberland Falcons, England): Boy, the new Nicole Kidman movie looked really good, didn't it?

I got to see it when I was in Australia, after coaching England in the World Cup. Coaching them was sort of like herding cats - if they happen to want to go where you do, you look very good; if they want to scatter, not even God and Steve Irwin combined can herd them.

I should have known it wasn't going to be an easy tournament when we had to come back to barely beat Tonga in a friendly immediately before the Cup started - yet I thought we still had a chance after we lost to the Aussies, after beating Papua New Guinea.

But when Papua sprung a huge surprise on Australia, and the Kiwis caught us as flat-footed as a platypus named Mainwaring, we were well and truly done - and I had plenty of time to watch "Australia". The Aussie fans there even cheered me - that, and the twelve pints I had that evening, made me feel a bit better.

Kevin Brock (European Vagrants, Ireland): Next time I coach Ireland, I'm going to ban the Guinness and the Jamesons' - they didn't help us at all.

It was a very bad start for us to lose to Tonga the way we did - first, because we played so much better than the score indicated; second, because we were handed a clean sheet; and worst of all, I lost to my friendly enemy from Wolverhampton and Rotterdam, Theo Kamis.

Then it was even more heartbreaking to lose to Earthquake and Samoa by a 6-nil scoreline - my players' girlfriends were more offensive than my players were! What I wouldn't have given for my Chemics' side - they would have shown Samoa how things were done.

Then, losing to Scotland?! WTBH?! At least we scored something in that game - but we wound up with the wooden spoon anyway. And not even a dozen Newcastle Brown Ale's were sufficient to drown my sorrows. And I hated the new Nicole Kidman movie - and I hated even worse the Poms' fans feeling sorry for us. Oh, how I would love to have a crack at them!

Still, the way England played in the World Cup, we'd kick their sorry arses from scrum to tryline....

Mercifully, the bell rang at this point...

...in future posts, we'll read the papers of these six EIRL managers:

Daniel Brew (West Yorkshire Terriers, Scotland):

Dino Vikas (Torino Titans, Papua New Guinea):

Antonio Alonso (CAU Madrid XIII, France):

Theo Kamis (Rotterdam Rhinos, Tonga):

Dave Paddock (Hull Kingston Redskins, New Zealand):

Brent Douglas (Wolverhampton Badgers, Australia):

Team Retention Update

Cumberland Falcons have today confirmed they will be taking up their place in the 2009 EIRL Premiership. The total number of teams seeking a franchise token for 2009 is now up to 12 with just 8 days to go for teams to confirm their intended participation.

Teams from 2008 that have so far failed to confirm their place are Gibralter Monkies, Lietuva Animals, Lisbon Leopards, Northern Bulls of Burgas, Oslo Icemen and Torino Titans.

Budapest Vikings and Tel-Aviv Nomads ended the season uncoached and as such their franchises will not be renewed. The exception to this will be if former Tel-Aviv coach and Gaming Officer Neil Croad makes contact before the deadline expires.

Champions set to continue

2008 EIRL Premiership Champions Zagreb Buffaloes have today confirmed they will be lining up to retain their trophy in the 2009 season. The Buffaloes, who were awarded a default victory in the Grand Final after the no-show of Tel Aviv Nomads will be looking to secure a second title, and to do it in the best possible way once the season gets back under way.

The total number of teams now signed up for 2009 is 11, with one new team yet to confirm their participation. Teams have until 30 November to confirm their place and be awarded a franchise token for the new season.

Terriers and Dynamo confirmed for '09

West Yorkshire Terriers and Dublin Dynamo are the latest teams to confirm their place in the 2009 EIRL Season confirming the number of teams so far at ten.

2009 Sign Up Latest and Consultation Update

Things are really hotting up now with teams racing to confirm their place for the 2009 Season. Teams only have another two weeks to confirm they will be continuing, or risk losing their place. This is so that a competition structure for 2009 can be confirmed. Also ending on 30 November will be the consultation on the 2009 rules and teams should check their recent e-mails (sent on 1 November) and respond directly with any comments or suggestions.

So far, 8 teams have confirmed their places for 2009:

• European Vagrants
• Hull Kingston Redskins
• Rotterdam Rhinos
• Monte-Carlo Martinis
• CAU Madrid Rugby XIII
• Saint-Maur Beavers
• Vienna Mustangs
• Wolverhampton Badgers

We are also hoping to add a new team, Duesseldorf Rhinelanders to the competition, and are hoping they will confirm their participation soon.

We're here!

Well to make it even easier to find out about all the latest goings on within EIRL, welcome to the online presence of the EIRL Telegraph, duly thrust into the 21st century in a blog format. Check back as we keep all the latest developments updated right here as we prepare for the 2009 season.